Here today and gone tomorrow.
Empty space that leaves me hollow.
Wishing I had just one more day.
Knowing that its selfish of me.
But I don’t care, I want what I want.

Memories are what I live amongst.
Focused on those time we spent;
Laughing, talking, being together.
Did I think this would happen? Never.
And so the pain is that much more.
If only I could see you when I open a door.
But I can’t and you are gone.
Its harrowing and haunting that someone,
Can simply just no longer be,
Right beside you like they wanted dearly.

Gone for forever but not forgotten.
The “luck” in life is entirely rotten.
Meanwhile anger lurks deep inside.
I don’t want to carry on without you by my side.
As I can’t act as though you weren’t my reason in life.

Now its been eighteen years at best.
Every moment of every day I remember this.
And no I’ve never got past the pain.
It didn’t lessen so much as shift in my brain.
Worm its way down and to the back.
To loiter somewhere deep in the black.
Yet poisoned my memories is something i have refused.
For you were the light that filled up the room.
Always bringing a smile to my face.
And no I haven’t found another to take your place.

Draws near my time and I don’t regret.
For now I can see you again.
Only thoughts as I’m slipping away.
Is of your laugh, our time, your beauty.
Reunion is what matters completely.

Self-serving with your boring talk.
Makes me want to take a walk.
Put in ear plugs and zone out.
Really anything that blocks your chase for clout.
Cause I do not care and never will.
What you speak is complete swill.
The desperate words of a spoilt man child.
One that is filled with jealousy and bile.
But instead I’ll give you a reality dose.
You are a nobody to most.
Name means jack when all you do is blab.
And people like me are sick of the cash grab.
As you don’t have a clue what the world is like.
Silver spoon up your ass while in your massive house.
I know you’ll claim this is jealousy,
But what of you shallow entity?
Exactly, nothing, and you know its true.
So swam off and live like you claim you want to.
In peace, quiet and without the furor.
Or was that another lie for you want more?
Do not care, I’m tuning out.
You’re on my block list.
Of that you should have no doubt.
But if you ever climb down off your ladder,
Maybe disdain won’t greet you with a jab to the bladder.

Bloodline of the worthy soul.
Too many begged for control.
So what remains is the soot.
Last vestiges of all we took.

Machinations not be design.
Sick of violence we follow line by line.
Pawns in a vicious cycle.
Cut it out, abort.
These ways are not vital.

Purse strings of a stingy fool.
Governing forms that are most cruel.
With an army bought and well fed.
Stand against and you end up dead.

Machinations not be design.
Sick of violence we follow line by line.
Pawns in a vicious cycle.
Cut it out, abort.
These ways are not vital.

We are the issue.
Cleave all tissue.
Perforate, vindicate.
Dominate, annihilate.
Slash them wide to sow them shut.
Forced upon innocent a fatal rut.
Watched them flounder, saw them slide.
Rejoice, this has been a suicide ride.

Machinations not be design.
Sick of violence we follow line by line.
Pawns in a vicious cycle.
Cut it out, abort.
These ways are not vital.

At the foot of a mountain, fashioned from steel.
Its what we’ll be climbing, but barely seems real.
Why did it rise, I cannot hazard a guess.
Simply one day it appeared, from out of that bramble mess.

Spire, spire;
Fueling new desire.
Higher, higher;
Burning with internal fire.

On the lower third, battling the systems.
Who would’ve thought, this place would be filled with wisdom.
From the very shell that runs from ground to tip,
This place looked fashioned only for things quite bleak.

Spire, spire;
Fueling new desire.
Higher, higher;
Burning with internal fire.

Two thirds of the way or at least I think so.
My mind is weary, does not want to rest though.
So on I push deeper into the belly.
Sadly it isn’t long before my legs turn to jelly.

Spire, spire;
Fueling new desire.
Higher, higher;
Burning with internal fire.

Rest taken even if not by choice.
Weariness departed when I heard the voice.
Angelic and yet it held something more.
If only I’d have known what would be in store.

Spire, spire;
Fueling new desire.
Higher, higher;
Burning with internal fire.

Reachin the summit, with barely a thimble of energy.
I was struck by, a demand of; avenge me.
Baffled and bleary I simply faltered backward.
As just as well I did seeing otherwise I would’ve been fractured.

By the falling baited trap.
Those batards thought I’d fall for that.
Yet i didn’t and so made them pay.
None of them did get away.
Which left me with chance to seek.
For my efforts I located a prize.
Researched it with open eyes.
Took the spire as my home.
Fashioned at its base a brand new hope.
Never thought it could be true.
Went from a pauper to a kingdom to.
Benevolent reign continues on.
Not something I wish to go wrong.
Yet each day I research more.
Dig into the vast depths of lore.
Fascinated by this lost ancient age.
If I professed this I might be called a sage.
Alas i know that would be a danger.
Especially in the hands of a cruel stranger.
So guard the secrets, learn and confide in a few.
All to rebuild this vault of view.
Name I bestowed as I continue.

Line the rivers and fill the halls.
Final journey to the resting stores.
Sad state we didn’t wish to see.
The death of the last great matriarchy.
Tragedy struck but never let go.
Maybe now they’re gone it’ll ebb not flow.
I cannot say and so I’ll hedge my bets.
While others cast them in iron sets.

Raise the mast with its new design.
Transition from old to new time.
Are these the ages we thought we’d know?
Almost certainly not so.
Yet these are hands that have been dealt.
Tradition born from the days of celt.
Not a clan around refuses to attend.
To imagine such is beyond what you can comprehend.

The hours late so the stalls are bare.
Last few trinkets are at prices quite fair.
But do you wish to part for crumbs?
To me it sounds like giving up ones thumbs.
A no brainer which should not be done.
Even under the point of a loaded gun.
Yet on this day of dreary remorse,
It would be most unkind to be so coarse.

Weather fits mood in the worst way.
Dawn til night its been a drizzling day.
However with night creeping it is so clear,
Conclusion has been rendered here.
And so i return to my quarters.
To hear the shrill of my daughters.
Asking questions with delight and glee.
Truly infectious, it lifts mourning from me.

There is a place that i love to be.
As far as I’m concerned it is perfect to me.
No its not a city filled with shops, people and bustling.
Nor is it the countryside with open spaces and peaceful living.
Rather its my bed for its warm and cozy.
I love the comfort it brings when I’m feeling lonely.
No other place is quite so good.
It keeps he warm, it helps me mend, it replenishes everything.

There is no place I would rather be.
Since a very young age its meant the world to me.
No adversary or treachery exists in such a place.
For it is undoubtedly the safest space.
And so my bed is what I continue to crave.
The softness always inviting me to rave.
Never have a bad word to say about it.
It makes me smile, it keeps me rested, never will it be bested.

I am what I wanna be.
Won’t take that away from me.
Try and you shall see.
How quick I put distance between you and me.

Imprisoning is never going to work out.
What is mine is mine and I refuse to bow down.
So stop your theft of my character.
Or watch how quick I will turn on ya.
With every fibre and every cell.
Never will I accept your spell.
For you are a trickster and a fraud.
Won’t succeed even if you sever every cord.

I am what I wanna be.
Won’t take that away from me.
Try and you shall see.
How quick I put distance between you and me.

Failure born from your lack of thought.
And no I still cannot be bought.
Cause your understanding does not exist.
Which is why you are getting pissed.
Anger building until you’ll take no more.
Unleash a wrath born from lies at your core.
For you have never struggled or even failed.
Just whined in volumes until prevailed.

I am what I wanna be.
Won’t take that away from me.
Try and you shall see.
How quick I put distance between you and me.

Cause I don’t need you.
Your attention is surplus.
And with your poison.
I will move on.
Make my own way.
Live freely.
Shrug you right off.
As you ain’t worth the cost,
Upon me being happy!

Hearts of the Nephilim.
Hear the beat, feel the rhythm.
Our fated coarse.
A route to take,
No longer will we wait.

Eyes filled with hate spin.
Break the mould, cheat to win.
Ignorant and damned.
Fight the horde,
Push existence to the end.

Stars shining while perversion does rise.
Mount defence, unleash battle cries.

We are the Nephilim.
This is our pulse, always kicking.
No avoiding our wrath.
Run if you wish,
You’ll still get a slash.

Power beyond true measure.
Blame us for pain when we seek pleasure.
Rising still from ash.
Taste conviction,
Expect it all to crash.

Stars shining while perversion does rise.
Mount defence, unleash battle cries.

I have an impulse to carry on.
Push, push, push ’til the break of dawn.
Ignore any exhaustion welling up inside.
Too inspired to let my brain become fried.
For creativity is a fantastic tool.
Allows you to dream like a grinning fool.
Never let negativity seep into your bones.
And if it tries make sure it leaves you alone.
Leave it to rot in some cut off twisted hell.
Cause somethings are stuck in a vicious swell.

There are times when I have an itch.
For it there is no cure to stitch.
Rather it helps to drive me on.
Allows me to overcome whatever may come.
Conquer the seemingly insurmountable.
Pull a new element out the periodic table.
To help me fashion this fresh direction.
No sight of self sabotaging infection.
With light in my heart and a skip in my step.
My head a nodding as i say; yep, yep, yep.

Judged by the rodents.
Damned by the waves.
Whatever comes next will send me to my grave.

Wrought by the weary.
Scrawled like ink on a page.
Time is short for I am naught with all this pain.

Stalked by the cynics.
Forced to play others games.
This place is driving me utterly insane.

Shrivelled for my misdeeds.
Impaled out on the plains.
What I’d give to be swallowed up by flames.

Check me out.
Or set me free.
Just end the torture.
Please let me be.

Shredded and beheaded.
But as yet not the fate for me.
All I know is I cannot take much more of this indecency.