Hero To Zero

Understanding ain’t always easy.
It can take a lot to not turn sleazy.
Become a selfish arrogant fool.
Take it out when life won’t bow to you.

But sometimes you need to be the hero.
Even when you feel like a downtrodden zero.
For not every dice roll can be a win.
Just have to try all over again.

Making changes does take time.
Rush them and you could cross a line.
Cause more damage than you can fix.
Burn bridges until you’re cut off and isolated.

Then you will never be the hero.
End up stuck as a complete loner zero.
With every hand stacked against you.
Options left numbering few.

So don’t push hard or complicate.
Work smart but don’t be a git.
If you’re decent then good will come.
But if you’re the asshole then you’ll be up the creak without a paddle.
See if then you can navigate the rabble.
Survive the falls that lie up ahead.
Make it out without becoming another of the unnamed dead.

One Less

Separation was on the cards long before it came.
I could see the signs but carried on, all the same.
Still when it struck the sting was no less.
Left sitting here there was pain, I must confess.

Severed.
Cut away.
One less person in my life from today.
Removed.
Set free.
Wish you the best as our ships sail away.

Not alone in how these things unfold, I am aware.
Doesn’t mean that them or me do not care.
Its just the way that this life, sometimes goes.
Part of how it forever ebbs and flows.

Severed.
Cut away.
One less person in my life from today.
Removed.
Set free.
Wish you the best as our ships sail away.

While the end leaves me sad I am pleased for the time we had.

Out Of Currency To Bribe Or Bully

I got a want to need need need.
And so I hunt with speed indeed.
For there is no route that I won’t walk.
Remember that before you decide to talk,
About your heresy lined deep desire.
Or you might end up on a funeral pyre.

Get out, get down, your it.
Sick of this selfish stupid shit.
Step out, step down, get lost.
You can’t bare incoming cost.

Milk remorse until I snap.
Throw all your crap right back.
For too many times you’ve spread lies.
Now negativity circles you like flies.
Reap what you sow, so its all on you.
Never escape this split in uneven two.

Get out, get down, your it.
Sick of this selfish stupid shit.
Step out, step down, get lost.
You can’t bare incoming cost.

With a wall filled with weapons you still cannot see.
Born from madness is travesty times three.
As was the way when the sky did fall.
Beg, steal and borrow as if you’re on call.
Hunter with no name for you sold out your friends.
Much like I decided to skip to the end.
Not cause my patience is wearing thin.
I just wanted to see how my life will be ending.

Get out, get down, your it.
Sick of this selfish stupid shit.
Step out, step down, get lost.
You can’t bare incoming cost.

Wanderer

I walk these roads alone.
No one here to guide me home.
Solitary but choice and chance.
Sometimes it stings like a lance.
Yet never do I change my course.
Might have to be done by force.
Though do I think it would change me?
No, I believe this is who I am always gonna be.

Singular.
Not pariah.
I built this palace.
Its my empire.

Number one.
I am selfish.
Live for me.
Not for everyone.

Take the line I want the most.
People linger in my mind like ghost.
Fallen down enough to build my bridge.
Could’ve done with help a smidge.
Still carried on without a hand.
Upon these mountains I now stand.
Sometimes hollow but I will not relent.
Humoured by how I refuse to ever repent.

Singular.
Not pariah.
I built this palace.
Its my empire.

Number one.
I am selfish.
Live for me.
Not for everyone.

Your point of view might not quite align.
These words are personal not inclined…
To be inclusive or inviting.
You might want war but I see no use in fighting.
Upon these grounds that I tread.
Viciousness only turns you dead.
Watch and learn are my own words to me.
Ever present aim to feel truly free.
Without a noose always threatening.
Or tragedy to bring in the sting.
Lost more than I can recall.
Sadness spreads but I refuse its claim to rule.
For misery does not deserve a stake.
So I smile to make the darkness break.

Singular.
Not pariah.
I built this palace.
Its my empire.

Number one.
I am selfish.
Live for me.
Not for everyone.

Unaccepting Of This Knowledge

Have you ever stared into your mortal soul?
Cursed with the knowledge it will go.
Eager to leave behind something of value.
Substance is what we always strive to…

Give us meaning.
Show us progress.
Feed us with that which is permanent.
Otherwise we will wither away.
Become the embodiment of decay.

Will you ever sign your name in blood?
Mark yourself in this dusty book.
Before in comes the final flood.
A nightmare you’ve often mistook…

As an omen.
Without open eyes.
These places are not yours to abide.
For all the fear is building high.
To be crushed beneath a prophesized sky.

Do you render?
I am the sender.
Picked clean.
Not seen.
Tied in knots.
Hands of ice.
Born again.
Victim thrice.
Take the poison.

Have you ever stared into your mortal soul?
Cursed with the knowledge it will go.
Eager to leave behind something of value.
Substance is what we always strive to…impart.

Jessie

Eyes full of spirit alongside a playful grin.
Then there were the glances filled with sin.
And when you were younger you tried to round us all up.
Would’ve had us run in circles ’til our heads went pop.
Yet to know you’re gone brings a sadness wave.
Though to the end you were, as ever, brave.
Heart of gold and strength of will.
Pity your stomach could never get its fill.
I jest, for you were a faithful friend.
A warm farewell is what I now send.
Sorely missed is what you shall be.
Your canine soul is now free.

Let Me Drift

Sleep will not come for me.
What am I to do about this truly?
Close my eyes but don’t drift off.
Feel like I’m watching the clock.
Tick and tock but I don’t feel drowsy.
If it doesn’t change soon I’m gonna feel lousy.
Especially if I see the sun rise.
As four am is my normal wake time.
And with it being Monday I’ll have work to get to.
Thought of trying to soldier through is not what I want to do.
So send me a fairy that brings me sleep.
Cause I’ve tried the classic of counting sheep.
It hasn’t worked and never does.
Just leaves me feeling stupid for trying such.
And my usual habit of emptying my brain,
Hasn’t helped me escape this conscious frame.

Wake With Weapons

Wake up one day with an axe in my hand.
Why, why; can’t comprehend.
Makes me think my dreams were reality.
God no, did I kill somebody?
Brain foggy and memory obscured.
Police, open up; can be heard.
Leap out of bed with my chest on fire.
Panic and fear burn like a funeral pyre.

Then in comes the door.
Armed but not ready for war.
Demands I surrender.
Then I blackout.
Its as if I’ve been on a bender.

When I awake bodies are strewn.
Blood and gore covers my room.
I see the badges and feel sick.
Clearly I did whatever this is.
Familiarity tells me this wasn’t unique.
Is that why I awoke holding this?
I think as I look at the axe.
Now it is bloody and I can’t relax!

Crash out my apartment feeling dizzy.
Black out again pretty quickly.
When I arise I’m somewhere new.
Surrounded by money, hookers and booze.
Confused I stumble forth.
A couple ladies crash in armed to the tooth.
Boss you okay, they ask all concerned.
How long have I been out, is this all earned?

Laughs erupt from deep inside.
A voice not quite mine feels inclined.
Fills in the blanks until it clicks.
Multiple personality disorder.
Innocent me is a fix.

Lost in the revelation that I’m a fraud.
Other me thinks its worth it to applaud.
How is this so fucking funny to you?
Cause I am the major of us two.
Then banish me is I can live in peace.
Stop being a child is his statement to me.
Then I realise everyone is staring.
Blackout again, hope its forever lasting.

Rise like the dead from a shallow grave.
Head is ringing and I don’t feel brave.
Look around this is not a dream.
I feel some liquid, my head is bleeding.
More than that there is a hole.
Terror strikes as I realise it all.
I’ve been shot but somehow survived.
Time to blackout I demand for the first time.

Doesn’t happen, I’m alone.
Bullet wound must’ve killed that clone.
What a time to lose the other.
Kinda sad I guess.
He was like my demented brother.

Three years passed with no relapse.
New name and life, feeling relaxed.
Never thought I would get to here.
Especially after the murder career.
Yet now I know everything the other me did.
Thankfully it netted him a great nest egg.
Its what I’ll be living off the rest of my life.
Not while I continue to fucking survive.

Barge Of Poison

Marauders out on the roads again.
Bandit clans forever closing.
Violent minds with vicious wishes.
At best you might survive only needing stitches.

Barren souls strung out on years of misery.
Falling faster than even societies decree.
Poor and rancid are conditions to survive.
Only the putrid have any chance to make it out alive.

Twisted talking in favour of sickness and pain.
Brain collapsing from all the rot I can’t contain.
Bitter pills won’t fix the fractures all around.
Every second betrayal engulfs thoughts with sound.

Killers coming for this mountain of snow.
Civility dies in the face of consuming so much blow.
Fratricidal with moments of true lucidity.
Born from this Deus that we can never ever see.

Addiction Affliction

Lie, steal, drink and cheat.
Seems you are back to repeat.
The same mistakes as you made before.
Chances are too few for you to ignore.

Thought progress was being made.
Instead it looks like you’re starting to fade.
Fall back into habits that led you to here.
Maybe you should put down the vodka and beer.

Consider how close you are to doom.
Lose your livelihood and it’ll be your tomb.
Surely there is more to lose even if you wish to refute.
No need to force your life into a painful execute.

Ask for aid.
Don’t be too proud.
Struggling happens.
No need to…

Shatter what you still hold in your hands.
Inflict upon yourself unnecessary brands.
Cause missteps don’t have to define your future.
Shift trajectory to avoid need of a suture.

Chances are low and you’re close to an end.
Self-preservation is something you should intend.