Forging Steel

Time has come for another story post. This week I’ve got a story that was inspired by the Halo Universe, the Spartan program to be exact. Yet, it has my own twist on the general idea of creating the perfect soldier, who isn’t meant to be as perfect or as anonymous as a Spartan-II. But that is all I’m going to say on that as I might (if you know Halo) have given away too much already. If on the other hand I’ve piqued your interest you’ll have to read to find out what’s going on and what happens. Enjoy!

Having had an extensive tour of the Jacinta facility based on a planet without a name, General Venetia Barton is eager to get to the focus of her visit.

Yet, this facility, as lush and sprawling as it might be with every included amenity, does not sit well upon her shoulders. Alas, it is a throwback to her predecessor. A man who believed victory should be attained using any tactic available. Venetia does not agree and yet the program was too far along for it to be cancelled. Perhaps if Systems Command were not aware of its existence things might be different. Alas, they are seeing as they greenlit the use of these funds for what has been dubbed Project Honour. Subsequently they are expecting results. Whether those results prove to be beneficial in terms of money put in to product output is an entirely separate manner. One which may be analysed at some point in the future, maybe. Though, with Systems Command there is no guarantee on that. Unless something were to leak to the public, well the civilian press and then to the public, but you get the idea.

None of that is of concern to General Barton, who having grown weary of the ramblings from the facilities chief scientist, Doctor Samuel Vargas-Hines, feels there is no better time than now to interrupt. He won’t like that. Of that much she is sure, largely based upon his theatrics thus far, as well as his the poorly veiled arrogance. After all, it is clear to her, that it lies much closer to the surface than he would probably wish to admit, if anyone ever questioned him on it. It is doubtful anyone ever has, Venetia could. She would be well within her jurisdiction if she did seeing as Doctor Vargas-Hines, in her approximation, has an ego the size of an iceberg, which he doesn’t, is showing but suggests he thinks this research has been a one man show. It isn’t, far from it in fact.

Rather, this project of his has been paid for by Systems Command money, lots of it. And it isn’t, contrary to some people’s popular belief, limitless. It is guaranteed, assured, but at the end of the day it is taxpayer money. It’s just it’s been slotted into the column that never gets mentioned or reported on.

In fact, the only people who are aware of Project Honour are top ranking brass, like her, who are on a need to know basis. Still, few will be as need to know as the current Head of Special Projects, Programs and Operations. That is General Barton’s current, recently granted, title. It’s a step up, in a form, from her previous role and yet it felt more like being shoved aside, into obscurity, when it came.

“Doctor Vargas-Hines, this is a very nice facility and all, and I do appreciate you taking time out of your day to show me around… But this is not why I am here. I’m here to see the output. The end result of the work that has been done on Project Honour. So, could we perhaps… hurry this along a little? Get to the showcase. I assume you have one prepared.”

Stopping mid flow during a rambling explanation, put in the simplest form he believes he could manage, Samuel does what he would do to anyone who interrupts him, he gives them a look. It’s one filled with burning intent, mild anger, condescension and arrogance from his pair of unblinking blue eyes.

Right after the look there is a twitching of the man’s nose alongside a screwing up of his mouth. The purpose, if there is one, Venetia cannot fathom. Nevertheless, she gives the head of Project Honour the benefit of the doubt, says nothing and simply waits for a reply. It should be forthcoming before long. Especially as all reports state that Dr Samuel Vargas-Hines is a brilliant man. Into that she read; overly ambitious, occasionally sanctimonious, always opinionated, blunt sometimes to the point of being rude and obsessed.

Standing here waiting for his reply, and having had him as a tour guide for the last two hours, there is nothing she has seen or heard to make her believe otherwise. Likely, he would think himself unique. Honestly, Venetia has met a plethora of men who just as perfectly fit that exact description and many more on top of that who marry nicely to sections of it, in various configurations.

When finally Samuel answers he only does so after having twisted his face into something meant to convey understanding. Unbeknownst to him he’s failed miserably, and yet exclaims with a clearly overly forced tone, “Of course, General. I am happy to accommodate. After all, we wouldn’t be here without…”

“Save it Doctor. I’m not anything like my predecessor. He liked buttering up. I don’t. I’m here to see what you’ve got, write a report, and submit it for evaluation. Now, if you don’t mind…” General Barton interjects cutting Doctor Vargas-Hines off for what is the second time.

This time around the response from the project lead is immediately clear because veins along his temples begin to throb angrily.

If she were not on duty Venetia might giggle at his reaction, but that would be unprofessional. She knows this is not a game for her enjoyment. Though, she does take great pleasure in cutting down anyone who dares to deem themselves automatically superior because of some title or another.

Biting his tongue, having decided General Barton is not his sort at all and that there is no hope of them getting along, Samuel mutters, “This way general.”

There is disdain in his voice, a hint of it only and nothing else. Sadly that hint is something he could not nix before it slipped out alongside his reply. It was inevitable. Or that would be his excuse if anyone were to ask him about it.

Honestly, he would greatly prefer General Marvin Armitage being back in the position he had held until a few months ago. Regrettably, everyone gets old and is forced to face being ushered into retirement. A waste Samuel continues to believe as Marvin proved to be in possession of a mind far superior to men and women half his age. Alas, there was no preventing the changing of the guard in Systems Command. They are the bosses, the paymasters and like it or not Samuel has to abide by whatever decisions they make.

However, there is one nothing that will never transpire; no one will ever be allowed to take Project Honour away from him. It is the future. There is no doubt about that. General Barton might not like it, but he will show her the necessity of it.

To boot it could not be coming at a better point in time with civilised humanity being engaged in a number of separatist and faction related skirmishes across its hundred systems borders. These same skirmishes have, in turn, resulted in more than fifteen million service personnel deaths.

Leading the way out of a pair of double doors released by his access card, Samuel followed a quarter step behind by Venetia, exit the lab used for growing the muscle strengthening threads to once more be under the shining brilliance of the triple suns that clutter the skyline of this unnamed world.

Beneath their feet is green grass, cut short and perfectly manicured. Put plainly it is little more than a field within a walled enclosure, except the walls extend further than the open training ground to encircle the entire facility of more than eleven buildings. These aforementioned buildings are in turn protected by three battalions of SC Marines.

“How are the marines working out for you, doctor?” Venetia asks trying to engage in idle chit-chat.

As with everything involving General Barton it is a test, of sorts. Principally for her own interest rather than for Systems Command. And as for what she is testing, it is the capacity for Doctor Vargas-Hines to move past an interaction that did not go as he would like or wish it to. When little more than a shrug followed by, “They serve their purpose,” is given in response, Venetia settles on him being about as adept at overcoming what would be to most other people barely of note about as well as most others with his personality type. That is to say, poorly. And while it might not seem it according to his use of words, it is the accompanying body language and tone used that give him away.

Moving swiftly on, Venetia asks, “This is the training ground? It looks… primitive.”

It is an observation and a fair one at that; seeing as with all the trillions this program has received she would have thought that dummies would not be that which had been chosen to be dotted about this field of imported turf to serve as bodies for target practice.

“This is but one training ground, General. But I assure you, it is not as primitive as it looks.”

Again, Samuel’s pride slithers through to strike like a cobra at the exposed vein of opportunity. After all, he sees Venetia’s comment as an accusation of mismanagement, where in actual fact it is nothing of the sort. To the General, having caught the overly defensive nature of the reply, it smacks of Doctor Vargas-Hines having been caught with his pants down, because it is primitive. Regardless of whether this is one of fifty training grounds or not.

Well aware of exactly how many training grounds there are, Venetia, who has studied the layout of this facility with interest, intrigue and ferocity, quickens her pace so that she falls in step alongside the facilities head scientific mind. Yet, she cannot help but compare herself to him. Not that doing so takes a great deal of time or effort for she soon concludes that where Samuel is arrogant, brash and loud, Venetia is quietly confident, meticulous and studious. That is not to say that the head of the project is not capable of those things. It is just that the General is those things, where as Samuel simply wields them, if and when they suit him. More likely to be if rather than when in all honesty.

Having crossed the training ground which does not impress, save for the imported grass, brought in for… Venetia cannot say. To her there seemed little reason to make the surroundings more… amenable. After all, this is a facility meant for training the next generation of soldiers. Not a place meant to act as a throwback to established, ceded worlds that have similarities to humanities homeworld of Earth.

Yes, humanity continues to frequent the planet. Though, only after its climatic deterioration was prevented. Currently it is undergoing reversal through the use of recent technological breakthroughs that are being repurposed to instead of terraform, undertake the process in reverse. The science behind it is… revolutionary, but way above Venetia’s understanding. She’ll freely admit that.

If she felt like testing Samuel, as they stride through an education structure fabricated from pre-formed sections that have been slotted and welded to form this building, she could ask if he is capable of explaining such developments. However, that would be cruel of her if she did as she is acutely aware that Samuel’s area of expertise involves a technological slant sat firmly in the human physiology and biology spaces and not on climate.

Looking around as they continue toward their destination, Venetia cannot help but note how it does not feel as though all this equipment does not in her eyes justify the money that has been spent establishing what is essentially a small, tiny really, colony on an unnamed world. Especially considering that it lies outside the borders of human space and could just as easily have been earmarked as the next world for colonisation.

“We are almost to the testing site, General.” Doctor Vargas-Hines announces out of the blue, shattering Venetia’s train of thought so utterly that she instantly forgets what her considerations had been in regards to.

Deciding they must clearly not have been of great consequence the uniform clad woman issues only a curt nod of understanding, nothing more. It’s a gesture that alongside her shaved head, Samuel cannot say suits the woman who is several inches in deficit to his own meagre height.

To be honest, Samuel was under the impression that SC had a minimum height requirement and that, seeing General Barton, the woman would be below the threshold he was convinced existed. Perhaps she wasn’t when she…

She isn’t that old! Is the exclamation that rings loudly inside his head from the facility AI which, unbeknownst to General Barton, has a direct feed to the lead of Project Honour.

You should tell her that, you know.

Why? What purpose would it serve? Samuel fires back in response to the words which are not spoken but felt inside his head. This connection a by-product of the overall project which Doctor Vargas-Hines thought beneficial enough to have it implemented within himself for better running of the facility. Or at least that was the excuse he had lined up, if he were ever queried about it.

Purpose; there is not one. But she is a System Command General, and now head of this…

I’m the head on this project. Samuel reminds interjecting over the facility AI, Control. A name the doctor feels does not properly convey the brilliance of its creation, a rare instance of Doctor Vargas-Hines complementing another scientific pioneer.

As to whom it was that created Control he hasn’t a clue. He could ask. Truthfully, simply think it and almost certainly he would be provided an answer. Alas, his interest in the matter is not sufficient enough for him to wish to do so. Ultimately, it could dislodge a vital piece of…

We’re here, Doctor. Is the declaration from Control, who he shoves and restricts from his mind using a zone blocker. Not because Control cannot be a part of what comes next, as the AI is Jacinta, but because it should seem as though there is no further insight held by Samuel than would be normal for a man who is the lead on a secret military project.

(D)Rift

Every word is so fake.
Wish you’d give it a break.
Jaw is always a flapping.
Its like you’re endlessly rapping.

Noise burrows into my brain.
All of it is such a drain.
And with nothing else to hear,
I know I need to get out fast my dear.

Cause you’ll be the death of me.
That’s not how it’s supposed to be.
We were supposed to be perfectly aligned.
Not end up with a cracking on my mind.

But still you refuse to see,
That what you’re doing is breeding insanity.
Which is why I’m so close to gone.
Sad to say that you don’t see it’s wrong.

So I wield the knife and cut.
A right action says my gut.
For I need time to reconvene.
Be detatched from all you scream.

If I don’t then I’ll be going down.
Not something I wish to suffer now.
Which is why I send this out to you.
This way my location you’ll have no clue.

Maybe you’ll realise what you put me through.
And shift your focus from your point of view.
I can always hope that’s true.
But truly I have no clue, if we’ll ever rejoin as two.

Water

Flow through the trenches.
Feed on the stone.
Temples of nature.
Sphere that’s our home.

Writhe in the dirt.
Erode and redeposit.
Carve at the surface.
Make it cursive.

Write the tales of history.
Forge new masses of ingenuity.
Empires rise and fall again.
But we are permanent and unending.

Trickle then roar.
Cutting some more.
Mark out the heavens.
Always in sessions.

Growing Pains

Violence is not a state of mind;
It is an affliction that’s most unkind.
Release the pain and set it free;
If you don’t you’ll drown in negativity.

These are words to commit to memory.
Say this before you count to three.
You have no reason to beat yourself.
That will never save your health.
And shortening days is a crime.
Don’t fall into that pit of slime.
Its viscous and drains your will.
Makes you want to say you’ve had your fill.
But truth is once conquered it does get easier.
Not saying simple cause that would be sleazier;
A lie scrawled that will always be proven.
What I say is you should just keep moving.

Pain is not a drug to take;
Overindulge and you will break.
So find an outlet and release;
Ultimately it will bring you peace.

Not a declaration to say its wrong.
We all suffer through many somethings.
But reliance on the emotion is cruel.
It’ll turn you to a ghoul.
That’s why you should face its truth.
Work through it like a sleuth.
Cause easy is not a word you should consider.
If you do it could turn you bitter.
Instead just accept that things aren’t right.
That alone will give you a wish to bite;
Tear out and move past what seems like a cage.
Once done it’ll feel like you’ve turned the page.

Censure

I’m always in trouble, it’s just the depth that varies.
At this point I’d be better roaming the prairies.
You think I’m joking but it’s so true.
Ever word out my mouth is an offence to more than a few.
Feels like I should just never speak again.
Take a vow of silence and ignore everything.
Live in a shack up in the hills.
Fill my days with redundant frills.
The kind that offer little more than a time sink.
At least that way I wouldn’t be responsible for kicking up a stink.
But doing that seems so dull to me.
At that point I might as well become a tree.
Stay rooted and motionless at a single spot.
Growing taller, content with what I’ve got.
What a dull way to whittle away your days.
Doing that would definitely send me crazed.
So damn the blame that’s laid at my door.
I’ll do as I wish and simply ignore,
Cast the screams out to the void,
Let everyone else be stroppy and annoyed.
It won’t last forever; we all know that well.
I’ll simply press on until they’re no longer under such a spell.

Talent And Treachery

Hey everybody! Back for another story post. This time I have a fiction story. Don’t really have any other categorization to give it beyond that. Though, I think you might believe otherwise when you start reading it. That’s all I’m saying. Not spoiling anything. Just a little hint is all you’re getting. Anyway, it’s about 8,700 words long. Have fun!

Standing on the precipice of a several thousand foot tall cliff, Qwera stares out over the valley below him. It’s ringed with mountains capped with brilliant white snow. Or at least it looks as though the valley with its tree stuffed steppes is hemmed in on all sides.

Qwera cannot say for sure if that is true for this is the first time he has set eyes on these lands. If they have a name he does not know it.

You see, he ventured out this way from far to the East. How much farther the landmass of the continent goes, or if he is even still on the same continent, he cannot say. Yet, stood there taking in the sights, sounds and limited, at this altitude, smells he feels as if this is right where he needs to be. Still, the journey had not been an easy one for the storms he has braved have been treacherous, and made worse by their extreme swings from one end of the spectrum to the other.

If he didn’t know any better he might think outside forces are working against him. Trying to halt his advance for reasons he cannot imagine. After all, it is not as though he is in search of anything out here. In fact, thinking about it he isn’t sure why he felt it necessary to journey out this way. There must be a reason but what it is he can’t put his finger on…

All of a sudden Qwera moves; jogging away from the edge he had been at he makes his way over to a narrow dirt path. The exposed and compacted soil is an off yellow colour, dry as a bone. Not that Qwera pays any mind to that as he begins to wind his way down the sweeping path toward what can only be the valley floor.

His head, every so often at random intervals, turns so he can look out over the valley which is becoming increasingly more difficult to get glimpses of due to his continued descent and the presence of towering lance like fir trees. They do more than a decent job of blotting out an increasing amount of his view, when he tries to look out at the valley beyond them.

“Is this some kind of joke, Naz? When do I get to the good part? And if you say it’s all walking I quit right here, right now.” Is the outburst unleashed from the lips of Hans Fitzgerald who has hold of a controller as he stands staring at the thirty two inch flat screen monitor sat atop the boring looking table that serves as his friends point of both work and play.

“Just zip it and keep going. I’m saying, spoiling, nothing.” Is the swift response fired back with an over exaggerated roll of his eyes which Hans cannot see.

Without another word Hans obeys, begrudgingly, and turns his attention back to the monitor and the game running upon it.

Qwera, the character, is forced back into motion after having stood unnaturally still throughout the brief exchange between the two roommates.

There is no doubting that the scenery is pretty and that Qwera, a warrior dressed in a mixture of colourful cloth with frills and small mini capes as well as sections of metallic plate is an interesting sight. To Hans he would have to say it reminds him of a mixture of European and Middle Eastern influences. For that reason alone he felt, in addition to the demand from Naz, intrigued enough to continue on. Still, he’s convinced this is going to be nothing more than a visually appealing walking simulator. After all, Nazim, for all his talent, seems averse to putting in combat of any sort, primitive or otherwise. Why that is Hans doesn’t have the foggiest because Naz is big on combat heavy games but…

Qwera, having reached the end of the path, stops. His head pans right, then left and back right again. Unarmed and seemingly wary he steps forward. All of these actions controlled by Hans who thinks, at least in any other game, this is where some big set piece would occur. He seriously doubts it will in Naz’s game and his pause to look around is only because he’s imagining what it would be like in a released AAA title and not one cooked up by his friend.

At the mere thought a myriad of names come burbling to the forefront of his mind. He banishes them all and Qwera is forced into motion once more.

Out of nowhere the ground begins to shake. Hans gets his hopes up only to quash them swiftly soon after with a reminder to himself who the designer of this is. For there is no way that Naz would…

A section of the meadow valley floor explodes upward in a shower of debris. Hans is in awe, his eyes wide. He cannot believe that some action related event is actually taking place in…

The dust cloud clears while debris continues to rain down. Hans’ jaw drops as he stares over the shoulder of his flame haired representation, who according to Naz will be given a proper back-story though will look roughly as he does now, at what lies ahead.

That statement, that the character is set and non-customisable, had irked Hans a tad. He prefers designing his characters. Creating a look for them, but alas that isn’t an option and has never planned to be, apparently.

Anyway, back in the game, Qwera remains stood in place without any input from Hans. Alas, that is right when Naz butts in, breaking the immersion, to utter that animations are missing currently. He then goes on to explain that there should be things happening onscreen, ones which affect the character model but that he hasn’t had chance as yet. Chiefly because he wanted to get a working prototype up and running first before adding the finer touches, details.

Making no effort to acknowledge the creators words, Hans exerts his control over Qwera and makes him run toward the massive mountain sized hulk of rock with streaming lava ‘veins’ that wind across its surface while it is stood there waiting.

By looks of things this enemy, what he thinks it has to be because of a red health bar across the bottom of the screen, is wielding a mace like club formed from rock with chunks of metal protruding and more veins of lava across its surface. Little does he realise that the ‘club’ is in fact a part of the creatures arm, but it’s a minor detail. One that many might miss unless they closely studied the character model, which is something that Hans obviously hasn’t done. To be honest he isn’t into the art of games only the entertainment value they bring.

Suddenly, the AI enemy swings with more speed than the controller wielding Hans would ever have been able to guess it might possess. Luckily, in the nick of time he receives a prompt to dodge. Instinctively he jabs at the face button and performs a roll which undoubtedly saves his life.

Qwera, at the end of the dive roll sideways, lingers, panting softly from the exertion. A bar on the screen, in the top left, has appeared and seems to be indicating a lack of stamina. To make matters worse its recharge rate is excruciatingly slow. It’s why Hans turns to his friend with despair in his eyes. The response he is offered is little more than a smile. And when the player turns back he catches the tail end of the mace club completing its swing and crushing Qwera to red pulp in gruesome and gory fashion.

“Come on! What is that? How is that fair? Is this a trick or…” Are the outraged ramblings which spill from Hans’ mouth as he gestures, with both hands, towards the monitor.

“Calm yourself Hans.” Nazim Akinpelu replies with a shake of his head, gesturing hands while an ever so slight smirk sits across his lips. It’s an expression which is only able to be seen because he has turned in his chair to look at the other young man, the one who is holding the controller.

Alas, Hans shows no signs of calming. He hates losing at a game, dying. He doesn’t care that he can always restart from a checkpoint or an earlier save, because he plays a life as though it is the only one. Usually when it comes to games made by Naz it means there isn’t an issue with that being how he plays.

There are things Hans wants to say, protests he wishes to make but after a long period of contemplation the only words out of his mouth are, “Can I go again?”

There is determination in the blonde haired man’s green eyes which do not marry with his tone. Yet, this look is one Naz knows well and has seen many a time. Not because Hans is a diligent sort of guy but because he’s a sore loser, a very sore loser. He might even be the sorest of losers he is so bad at taking L’s.

“Sure. You can go as many times as you like.” Is the chipper response given.

Something about how Naz said those words doesn’t sit right with Hans. Hence, that is why he blurts, “It’s rigged isn’t it? You can’t get past that point. You’re not meant to. Is that ‘cause that’s as far as you’ve got with the game?”

“No; to all of what you just said.” Is the reply which is given without letting anything slip, though hinting at the possibility that there may be more to the game than meets the eye.

Sure, there is some UI missing, which if this were a final version of the product might be sacrilegious to have omitted, but it isn’t and so Hans will have to live with that if he wants to experience everything in this game, the one that Naz hasn’t got a name for it yet.

In actual fact he has a list eight pages long of potential titles to give what he’s been working on. Sadly, as yet he hasn’t been able to nail down an option which really speaks to him. It could be that while he thinks a number of the names are good, which is why the list is only eight pages long and not eighteen, none of them are right. If that is the case then he has to hope that something, inspiration wise, strikes him along the way.

“Fine.” Says the blonde man having a mini strop in the moments before, during and after he opens the pause menu and selects the restart option. That reaction by Hans leads to a tiny grin appearing on Nazim’s face, which is gone as swiftly as it had appeared.

A few seconds pass as the game goes about reloading, during them a debug screen can be seen running. As yet there is not a proper loading screen, but seeing as the game is running off an SSD its appearance is only fleeting and might be something Naz leaves in for the final version. You might wish to ask why; well it’s because he thinks it’s cool and might help some smart souls build mods if it were ever to be released. He would like it to be. By far and away he thinks this is the best project he has ever conceived and worked on.

When the loading is complete, Qwera appears onscreen once more, alive and well and stood on the precipice of the cliff that overlooks that valley below.

Having turned to Naz, Hans asks, “Any advice you want to give me?”

Shaking his head slowly, the designer with his wild shoulder length hair but well groomed beard and brown eyes assures with a wry grin, “Nope.”

“Fuck you. You’re only saying that to torment me.”

“Yep.” Is the admittance from Naz who pivots his chair away from his friend to face forward once more as if to say, get on with it.

Without hesitation Hans does exactly that and quickly puts Qwera back on the path, spiralling downwards towards the valley floor, for what is a second time.

To be honest the blonde man hasn’t a clue as to what he could’ve done differently and wonders if he’s being setup by Naz. He’s the sort of guy who would do that. Maybe it’s payback for all the little walking games he’s built which Hans called pretty but boring. If that is the case, and he has no intention of developing this further or completing it, then wow Naz is a douche. And an overcommitted one at that, because there is no way Hans would spend more than maybe ten to fifteen minutes on a similar endeavour. Then again, Naz is a patient man. A bit too much, Hans thinks before taking note that he is close to the valley floor again.

However, unlike last time he doesn’t walk straight into the arena. No. Rather, he has stopped.

“Wait, that wasn’t there before.” Is the exclamation which passes his lips.

“Wasn’t it?” Comes the overly dramatic response from the black haired designer and coder who more than anything wants to build a career in the games industry. Not so much at a big studio working on mobile or even AAA titles but as an indie, a one man band. Maybe alongside a small team, a dozen developers at most, but that would be a one day sort of thing, maybe. Though it would only occur if he were to find the right sort of people. He hasn’t, not that he’s tried to, as yet and no, Hans has no artistic or coding skills whatsoever. He is a gamer, a player, not a creator. Even if he were Naz wouldn’t want him to join, for reasons. Really good reasons too he thinks.

For a fact Hans knows that the pathway he cannot take his eyes off wasn’t there before, and that was without his roommates reply added to the mix. Yet, he says nothing to challenge the subterfuge used against him and instead forces Qwera, a name he doesn’t like nor understand, down this freshly discovered avenue. It’s lined on either side with densely packed trees which blot out a good deal of the…

Suddenly, Hans realises that he’s seen no sun in the sky but that it is beyond a shadow of doubt daytime in the game. He shrugs. Seeing the shrug out the corner of his eye Naz giggles silently to himself. He guesses that the reaction is in response to something not feeling right. It might be he’s noticed the lack of a sun, a source for the light being provided. More than likely Hans will believe it’s something unfinished, that Naz has missed or yet to include. If only he knew the reality, the importance of details not mentioned but present.

Reaching the end of the path, Hans sends Qwera headlong into a small opening at the centre of which stand a pedestal with something clearly laid out upon it.

It doesn’t look like a weapon but it might…

Without warning the floor disappears beneath Qwera. He tumbles end over end into the dark abyss.

Outside the game the blonde man lets out an exasperated sigh alongside a backward flick of his head, so that he is looking straight up at the white ceiling above his head.

“Really? So that’s how I die? To something I cannot avoid. You made this to punish me, didn’t you?”

“Ha, nope. I made this because I wanted to. You’re the one who wanted to try it, so I let you.”

There is a hint of smugness in Nazim’s voice as he reminds Hans that he is the one who wanted to try any and every game that his roommate produces. Sure, all of them have been, in his eyes, boring until this one but still he feels irritated at being reminded he’s the one who asked for this. It’s why he is pretty confident now that Naz has built this ‘game’ purely to mess with and frustrate him.

“Shut up. You know I don’t like dying…”

“Who said you died?”

“What? I fell into a fucking big hole. How can I not be dead?”

“Does it say, Game Over?”

“Well no, but…”

“Then try doing something other than quitting then Hans.” More than Naz likely means that statement to it cuts deep for his roommate who does have a tendency not to stick with anything he turns his hand to in life.

Evidence of that is that the blonde with green eyes has shifted course five times. In fact, he’s set a new record for the university. Not one they or any of their others students wished to see attained. Yet, it has been and by Hans Fitzgerald. How long his latest obsession, and that is what they border on for as briefly as they last, forensics will last is anyone’s guess, including Hans.

Being Hans’ roommate means that Naz has been present for almost all of it, except for in the rare instances where he goes to class. And that is incredibly rare. Chiefly that is because Nazim Akinpelu is smarter than probably anyone else in a hundred mile radius, maybe more.  Which means there is nothing lecturers can teach him that he cannot teach himself, and has.

If he were anyone else he would’ve been kicked out for his abysmal attendance but not Naz, he’s a star pupil in every way. Well, honestly he makes a star pupil look second rate. He’s better than a star; he’s more like a whole nebula. Though, all he wants to do is make games. It’s a childhood ambition of his, and despite his teachers and parents attempts, it is a path he refuses to stray from. Sure, he continues with his studies. But as soon as he’s done he throws himself right back into developing whatever his latest project is. Not in an obsessive way however. Naz always makes sure to keep a healthy balance. It’s because he doesn’t want to burn out. Still, he puts in plenty of hours and work. To others it might be unhealthy but the wild haired young man knows his limits, when to push and when not to.

Taking his roommates advice, Hans presses a button chosen at random. Nothing happens. He wonders if this is some trick. Surely Naz wouldn’t be that cruel?

Deciding not to examine the likelihood as to whether he is or not, the man with short perfectly styled blonde hair, which has only gotten more blonde during the summer months as a result of the sheer hours of daylight, presses another button. Again there is absolutely no response. Sighing, Hans tries a third and then a fourth. Still, he is met with no response.

Feeling testy, he looks toward Naz who if he is aware of the glare he is receiving makes no efforts to acknowledge it. As a result that presents Hans with two options, as far as he is concerned; continue his attempts or explode into accusations. He settles on it being the former, though would like and could with ease indulge in the latter.

Fifth time lucky proves to be no such thing whatsoever.

Running out of options the blonde man tries for a sixth time only for the screen to pulse red, once. It isn’t the outcome he was expecting, which was a resurrection of Qwera but feeling hopeful Hans continues to press the button until a prompt appears onscreen. Said prompt invites him to continue his pressing, but this time with the inclusion of a bar. His guess is that said bar has to be filled.

Slow presses, he soon learns, do nothing to fill the bar. A sideways glance at Naz reveals zilch and so Hans tries a different approach, a few rapid taps. The bar partially fills and then almost as quickly empties when he stops.

Nodding, believing he understands, Hans erupts into a frantic hammering on the button. Rapidly the bar fills to bursting; a red aura appearing in the darkness only for a few seconds prior to Qwera bursting out of the inky black covered is flames. It looks awesome, Hans thinks while taking note of the fact that the character now has a massive sword which dwarfs the avatar he has control of.

“Holy shit!” Is the response which is offered by the young man holding the controller.

“I’ll give you a hint, try the valley floor again.” That is all Naz says. Nothing else is added. It’s as much as he feels should be given away.

Without hesitation that is precisely what Hans does. As a result he discovers that Qwera can sprint now and at twice the speed they had been capable of previously. That is something Hans is relieved about because up until this point he’d felt Qwera’s jog was far too pedestrian for his liking. Better than the walking sims made by Naz previously but certainly lacking compared to purchasable titles.

Once back at the edge of the valley floor arena, as Hans thinks of it, he takes a deep breath. Again, in his mind he is thinking of this life as if it were his own, singular and finite, and then he moves Qwera forward.

Just like the first time the floor begins to shake with Qwera the avatar showing no reaction to what is happening onscreen.

Unlike the first time, Hans takes a look around. He’s seen the reveal. It won’t be special to him this time round.

Instead, he wishes to know where the light is coming from. Just as he thought, there is no sun in the sky. In fact, the sky he realises now is… wrong. He cannot explain it past that.

Finally, the hulking enemy is before him, its reveal over. Quickly he dodges when prompted and then tests the buttons to see what Qwera can do. He’d tried when the character had first been resurrected but had been met with no response whatsoever. In this arena however he is greeted to a flurry attack, a jump and a block in additional to the dodge already performed on two separate occasions up to this point.

Regrettably, he feels something about the jump in particular strikes him as underwhelming. It might be the height, which does look decidedly meagre, or maybe it’s the responsiveness, it not being snappy enough. He can’t be sure. But this is a prototype, not a finished game so he shouldn’t balk too much.

Feeling better prepared the man with green eyes, holding the controller, realises the enemy has made no attempts to attack the in-game character, Qwera.

“Why hasn’t he swung at me, he did last time?”

“Cause you haven’t pushed him like you did last time Hans; that’s why.”

“So I screwed myself?”

“Yep.” Is the succinct response provided.

“But that path wasn’t there before. The one through the trees, I mean?”

“It was, just a bit more hidden. Don’t want to spoon feed the player, if I’m honest.” A shrug accompanies the explanation.

“If you say so.” Is the reply from Hans who is not convinced at all that a lack of hand holding is a positive in this game, or any other for that matter.

Returning to the game, Hans performs another short test of the buttons and options available to Qwera. Evidently, a fair few of the buttons do nothing, which leads to questions forming in Hans’ head as to why that is. Is it because there will be more options which will be available down the road, like additional equipment or skills, or because Naz felt it best to keep things simple and not overload any prospective player?

Whichever it might be it matters little for he asks none of his questions as he instead surges forward toward the mighty enemy. The same one which had on his first go struck with surprising speed and ended Qwera in a single attack.

Again Hans reaches the trigger point and again the hulking beast of molten rock winds up for its strike. This time Qwera dodges the incoming devastation with ease. And right after has Qwera lay into the boss with the oversized sword.

Yet, the strikes take a surprisingly long time to complete. Far slower than they’d felt when he’d been testing them out of combat, at the edge of the arena.

Overcommitted, a stomp with no forewarning provided throws Qwera back. Hans’ eyes go wide. He’s worried, deeply so, that this might spell the end for him and he’s only done maybe a fifth, if he’s being generous, of the enemies overall health bar.

Unsure of the controls, the blonde man hammers buttons hoping one will get him back to his feet quicker. None do and so he is forced to watch as a mighty fist comes slamming down on his in-game avatar. Hans, throat dry and itchy, is convinced this is the end, that the character has been squished. It’s why his shoulders drop in defeat. A spark of rage fires deep inside, pointed toward Naz who has made this ruthlessly hard. Right after the appearance of that spark he wonders if the difficulty has been dialled up to mess with him. A snarl appears on his face but for some reason he presses that same button, the one that had resurrected him before. There is a reaction, but one which is different to the last time in the small clearing. Nevertheless, a smirk appears across his face in response and Hans continues to hammer that same button. Before long Qwera reappears with the mighty crushing fist held aloft over his head.

“Son of a bitch, you put in a secret win mechanic.” Is the cry from a joyous Hans.

He is grinning from ear to ear now while he continues to hammer at the button on the controller in his hand until…

The club comes swinging in, shattering the giants balled fist and sending Qwera flying across the arena and into a low wall which snaps their back in half resulting in the appearance of a Game Over screen.

“Fuck! Are you kidding me? What is that bullshit Naz? How am I supposed to get past him if he one shots? Even your win mechanic doesn’t allow me to defeat him. You definitely dialled this up to screw with me.” Are the accusations which the enraged Hans casts in Naz’s direction, his face red like a tomato as he screams the words loudly.

“I didn’t. Give me the controller, I’ll show you.” Assures the wild haired designer who has his hands raised up as if to say he surrenders, submits.

A flexing of Han’s snarl follows. He doesn’t like where this is going and thinks the only thing worse than being beaten by this game is to have its creator make him look a fool.

“You built it; of course you can beat it.” Is the excuse provided in anticipation of what might come next.

“Even if I ‘rigged’ it like you are accusing me of?” Comes the retort from the designer utterly outwitting his opponent.

Aware he has been outmanoeuvred Hans stops dead and mulls over his thoughts.

He might not like it, or want to believe it, but it does seem a little farfetched what he is accusing the designer of. That is why ultimately, following a dropping of his shoulders, Hans relents and hands the controller over to Naz.

A quick reset of the game, jog down the spiralling path, drop into the abyss off the side avenue, resurrection in god form and rush back to the valley floor where the enormous enemy breaks through is followed by a swift three minutes of perfectly timed dodges, blocks and flurries. It ends with a short cutscene that sees this boss torn asunder, turned into nothing but bloody chunks of rock and lava based flesh.

“How the fuck…?” Is the astonished exclamation from the blonde.

“Patience. That is what you need for this game. It isn’t a hack and slash. It’s a combat game. I designed it to reward those who take their time, learn mechanics and watch for tells that indicate when an attack will be coming.” Naz says by ways of explanation.

“Booooooooooring.” Is the utterance made in self-defence because Hans knows he isn’t a patient player, which is why he tends to player run and gun shooters or fast paced action games where stun locking enemies is simple and encouraged.

“You don’t like it then?”

Feeling he should admit the truth, “No, I love it. It’s super awesome. Is there any more to it or…”

A quick restart to put the game back at the opening menu screen is followed by, “There is, but no save states for the moment. So if you want to see more. You’re going to have to get there yourself.”

“Fuck off, come on. I just want to get a peak at where it’s heading.” Utters the defeated and demure Hans as Naz hands him back the controller stating, “Then get there. Find out for yourself. I’ve got to run a few errands. Be back in a couple hours, ok?”

It’s rare for Naz to go out but when he does he really is gone for hours. Early on Hans had decided to follow him to find out what he does, but he found it was nothing exciting, just the boring things which are too adult and responsible for his liking.

“Yeah. See you in a bit.” Hans replies selecting that he wishes to start the game while Naz grabs his keys and heads for their apartment door without saying another word.

Judgement Rendered

Testify to the gods below about how you don’t deserve this though.
Did they heed your words like you thought that they would?
Or was it just a pointless waste of time you haven’t got?
These are questions that you should’ve thought.
But you were too busy drinking in all of your hype.
Did you never hear that indulging will earn you a stripe?
Just not the kind that will swing the pendulum in your favour.
If you wanted that then you should have had different behaviour.
So tell me what you plan on doing to change your hand?
Is it simply be honest and polite to those in this land?
I thought not and what a solemn pity.
Your focus remains on attempting to be witty.
Well let me know just how that works out for you.
I’m stepping away cause I’m not stuck here too.
You’re brow furrows cause you don’t understand.
It’s simple really I was permitted to pass the gates of heaven.
Demands are what fly from between your lips next.
None of them leave me at all vexed.
Maybe time will lead you to some kind of epiphany.
I truly hope that that is what will transpire, effortlessly.

Conflict In Waves

There is so much noise in the air.
Can’t focus on a single note of it here.
My brain is scrambled and I need some quiet.
Feels like my head is having a riot.
A war between nameless, faceless things.
Not sure what any of them might bring.
So give me a moment to pause and think.
Before I go right past the brink.
Indulge in what I could not care less about.
Such a move could leave me in drought.
Gasping for something to quench my thirst.
This is what I would call my head at its worst.
Refusing to let me have some peace.
Silence I scream as my release.

The quiet is starting to erode.
Feel like my mind wishes to goad.
Insight panic and a war within.
Usurp against what I’ve been building.
Scribble it out so it can start afresh.
This is not a sentiment I will bless.
For life is mine and it has no right.
Against this treachery I will fight.
Ignore the agony that it swings,
It sends it on desperate decayed wings.
So I shoot them down with a bow.
Each one of them is not a part of my flow.
And while I hate this tussle for power,
I cannot refute that it ended silent glower.

Finally the battlefields are still.
And I stand as the victor in my steel.
Mind back to a single mass.
No exclamations of sass.
Just coherence which I adore.
No longer do I feel sore.
With thoughts that flow free.
I really do feel like I am back to me.
And foolishness does not dwell here.
Yet those issues again may rear.
Not a problem for I have a plan.
And I’ll thrive once it’s passed again.
Much like I will from now.
So to those aggressors I say chow.

Through The Shallows

Raindrops pour from the sky again.
It feels like it just won’t wane.
Your mood fits with the weather.
You’re really not feeling clever.
Roam about with your head low.
Misery will not let you go;
Release the hold it has on you.
Offer a respite if only for a few.

Cause it won’t last forever.
Keep your chin up and endeavour.
Fight through the will to quit.
You can survive all of it.

Don’t fold and fail.
You will prevail.
Keep your grip strong and through this you will sail.

Drowning sense of doom nearby.
It urges you to accept crucify.
Sell yourself to the damned.
Each statement is a command.
But do not heed what it states.
Its wish is to invert the fates.
Keep the pressure and force your hand.
This is all that it has planned.

But it won’t last forever.
Keep your chin up and endeavour.
Fight through the will to quit.
You can survive so much of it.

Don’t fold and fail.
You will prevail.
Keep your grip strong and through this you will sail.

Hold your head up.
I know your fed up.
Change is on the horizon.
Hope will soon be rising.
As black turns to blue,
Darkness will be banished from you.
Positivity is in your grasp;
It’s why the melancoly is beginning to gasp.

And it didn’t last forever.
Kept your chin up and did endeavour.
Fought through the will to quit.
You’ve survived every bit of it.

Dug Right In

Panic lies right beneath the skin.
I never wanted to let it in.
Wormed its way to the win.
I can feel it creeping.

But the crawl isn’t quite enough.
Everything it wants to call a bluff.
Makes me question what came before.
All the names wear at my core.
Sabotage each new prospect.
Little that it does not affect.
It’s like I’m wood being wittled down.
Starting to think I can’t break my frown.
If that’s true then why fight on?
I’m so bored of feeling wrong.
Tears well but never flow.
Why am I a part of this show?

Sick to my stomach and getting worse.
Feels like I struggle with a curse.
It haunts my mind day and night.
Not sure how much longer I can fight.
And distractions never serve me well.
They aid the feeling so it can swell.
Climbing up my spinal column.
Twisting me so I’ll be a golem.
Creature lost in the rain.
Blocked and unable to drain.
No way to vent this bile in my chest.
Just give me a chance to rest!

Panic lies right beneath the skin.
I never wanted to let it in.
Wormed its way to the win.
I can feel it creeping.

Smother me and call it quits.
Not sure I can take much more of this.
Screams that won’t come out.
Every second I am filled with doubt.
Debating options all based in loss.
Might as well be nailed to a cross.
Strung up in the scorching sun.
Or within my mouth full of a gun.
Not my wish but I’m so uninspired.
If life is pain than I wish to be retired.
Let me drift off into endless sleep.
Otherwise I might morph into a heap.

Panic lies right beneath the skin.
I never wanted to let it in.
Wormed its way to the win.
I can feel it creeping.