In Flame

You burn today
You burn tomorrow
You burn until life is hollow

Along the path of shattered night
Roam the plains with a lack of sight
Hoping for a different lens
Doling blame out again

You burn today
You burn tomorrow
You burn until life is hollow

Bearing gifts of lies most debonaire
Planting seeds of we don’t care
The lands are turning to black ash
Kill all those who refuse this sash

You burn today
You burn tomorrow
You burn until life is hollow

Rolling hills of endless misery
Walk upon the barren sea
The salt seeps into the soul
There is no ultimate goal

You burn today
You burn tomorrow
You burn until life is hollow

Force Of Nature

In comes the storm
Are you feeling worn?
Trapped out in the rain
Tiny flecks of pain
Bouncing off the skin
Little more than paper thin

Soon it turns to ice
Stinging with every slice
Drenched to the bone
Out here all alone
Starting to feel ill
No cure by taking a pill

Winds do howl again
Ignoring everything
Whistle as they pass
Don’t care about the mass
Ripping objects free
Ignoring any thought of plea

When it finally goes
All are still in throes
Rumble like a hill
Piled up like unpaid bills
It’s when the search begins
Hope to find still living skins

World Tree

This week is different. Well in as far as the story this time isn’t Sci-Fi! I know it’s surprising. Felt like a change and so this story is very much fantasy. The idea here is that humanity are not the first species of their kind on Earth. Plus it’s short (for me) at 8,300 words. Really happy I managed to keep it from getting overly long and complicated. So I guess that’s another difference from other stories I’ve posted. To be honest I do find it harder to do fantasy as settings and story ideas do not come as easily as they do Sci-Fi. Because of that I have no idea what you’re going to get next week. But that’s jumping the gun and before that there is this story. With that I’m done waffling and so I hope you enjoy, World Tree.

Gossin is sat at his desk. It’s a simple plain wooden construction sat at the lateral centre of the room which is equally as sparsely decorated. He is facing the door, which is again a simple wooden construction with only a door knob and keyhole to denote the direction it is able to swing open into the room. From his position it would pivot right but at this time it’s closed.

At this time Gossin is busily sifting through the various documented reports that have been passed to him. It is one of his many duties as a 3rd Cleric, but that doesn’t mean he finds it any less dull even after the years he’s held this position. Flames from nearby candles serve as the only illumination he has in this wooden box of a room that is without anything that could appropriately be termed a window. That is not to say that there is no opening to the outside world, as there is. But in truth the opening is little more than a small square that is high up on the wall at his back. To make matters worse it’s offset and has for many months been covered by a shutter to stop a myriad of birds from flitting in and around the space whether he be occupying it or not. Such a thing had been a common issue when he first moved into this space a little over a year ago. Gossin still isn’t sure as to why he was given this space but at least the view when he steps outside at the end of one of his long days is a sight to behold. After all, few get a position up on the Undulating Fields. It’s a place that is about as close to the world tree as one can get without being a 1st or 2nd Cleric.

Those are positions he will never ascend to because of the combat training he embarked upon during his youth. He isn’t quite sure now why he felt so compelled to undertake the training, but something tells him it might have been to impress. He can’t fathom as to whom. It certainly wasn’t his beloved Inara. He pauses. Memories having flooded in at the mere mention, mentally, of her name. His narrow shoulders sink and the gaze of his orange eyes drift from the parchment before him to an empty space of the well-worn desks surface. They linger there, staring, until he gulps loudly. He isn’t even aware of the sigh that has passed his thin dark lips which make the slit shaped nostrils of his flat, almost nonexistent nose flare.

Gossin misses Inara greatly. It’s been nearly a decade since her death and yet he cannot say with any certainty that the pain is any less cutting than it had been in the days since her ceremonial departure. The one that saw her soul returned to Yggdrasil. The ceremony is part of his people’s custom to see those departed from this life returned to the entity that birthed them, the first forms, as the race of man defines them.

The first forms name for themselves is, or at least was once exclusively, Protoss. It’s a name Gossin rarely hears spoken anymore. Perhaps that is because it is not necessary for it to be. Though he cannot be sure of that he must admit. The race of man having had its effect in the millennia since it was birthed into this world by Yggdrasil. Yet, it is the Protoss, the first forms, from which man was then shaped, that still guard and watch over the world tree. It is the giver of life. The provider of all natures’ gifts and without it none of them would be here. Not the birds, the beasts, the trees, the grasses, glades, rivers, them or man. Many a time the first forms had expected man to want control of the tree, especially in the early days of their production, but they had not. Instead, they seemed content to get as far from the first forms, the Protoss, as possible. They said they wished to carve out a world of their own. Build with their hands. Learn using their minds. Documents from that era speak of scepticism on the part of the first forms and yet man had been true to its word.

Still, that was long ago and by all current accounts man is now much closer than they have ever been. The Protoss do not count the period immediately after the dawn of man as part of that proximity assessment. There is no need to. They were always going to be birthed under the great canopy of Yggdrasil. All things are.

Because of man’s closing proximity many first forms have wondered what their intent might be. The consensus is that they are merely doing again what they have done before, back when they left the cradle of their birth, which is to spread. They build communities. That is what man does and again it seems they wish to do that here. It seems to be the result of remembers of an older established order wishing to strike out on their own without the hindrances of things long since established.

Such things are not something the Protoss understand for they have never fractured like man seems so intent on endlessly doing. Then again the first forms also do not engage in frequent bloody war like man either.

In truth it has been almost seven centuries since one Protoss fought another. That was during the Dark Age when the first forms had forgotten who they were, where they had come from and the importance of maintaining a balance of all things. It ended when there was a clear response from Yggdrasil. That response came in the form of eruptions. These eruptions carved and scarred the land for a generation. The Protoss took it as the warning it was meant to be. A declaration made by the creator of all things that this would be their fate, their world, if they continued down their violent path. None had wanted to see their world turn to ash like it had during that generation and so conflict was laid to rest.

Following the warning and during the lands recovery the Protoss had restructured and reformed themselves into the society they are today. It’s a civilization to be proud of and the first forms very much are. Still, Gossin wishes Inara were here. He misses her terribly and can still taste the fragrance she used to dab herself with before starting every day. It clings to the back of his throat. Sometimes he finds it painful, other times it draws a smile to his lips as he remembers the good times they spent together. Today is the former as he replays her demise fearfully wishing it could have been different.

Suddenly there is a knock at the door. The sudden trio of raps pulls Gossin out of his thoughts with a start. Following a brief period of recovery he blinks and finds that he is unable to use his voice. That surprises him. Thankfully following a clearing of his throat, which is drier than he would have anticipated seeing as he hasn’t been incessantly speaking, he tries to speak again. On this attempt to speak he finds himself able to demand, “Enter.”

The reply is swift and comes in form of the door creaking open. Copious amounts of daylight spill through the widening gap as Gossin shuffles the parchments before him. They had gotten into a terrible state that was not at all befitting of a man of his station. But with them having quickly been aligned with a couple taps on the pockmarked surface of his well-worn desk, he places them off to the side. His place amongst them is marked, though to be truthful he cannot remember an ounce of what was written upon them. Such details are lost to him. He frowns frustrated by his lack of concentration, but swiftly dispels the expression so not to draw attention as a guard shuffles into the room.

Gossin isn’t sure why the moniker continues to be bestowed anymore as they guard nothing to be honest. In fact, The Might are the only protectors that carry arms and offer protection of any kind now. Whether they are proficient in their use of weaponry is another matter entirely. None of the first forms living have ever seen battle. Unlike the members of man who frequently engage in bloody scraps amongst their own for conquest of land and glory.

Such antics had long led Gossin to wonder as to why Yggdrasil does not impart the same kind of warning unto the race of man as it had the Protoss so long ago. Perhaps the world tree does not wish man to fulfil the same responsibilities as the first forms. If only they could commune with Yggdrasil like they used to. Or so the stories, long handed from generation to generation, suggest was possible. There is no way of knowing if they were truthful or fabrications morphed by the passage from one generation to the other. Gossin hopes they are true as they offer a sense of comfort that he would feel naked without and if they could, they can’t, be found to be distortions of past events.

“Cleric, I have something to bring to your attention.” The guard, a young looking Protoss with dull blue skin and purple coloured eyes says now that the door is closed and he is stood at the centre of the open space. His hands are clasped behind his back which is straight and held expertly in place. The young guards’ eyes are forward. Not looking at Gossin. Guards rarely look at Cleric’s. Some nonsense about respect that Gossin has never found any mention of but that all guards have convinced themselves, and those that continue to join their ever diminishing ranks, that is necessary. In many ways Gossin will be happy when the guards are no more. They serve little purpose other than as interruptions that break up the days of reviewing reports. At one time the reports he sifts through would have been etched by the guards own hands. Those days are gone. Fairly recently, certainly well within Gossin’s time serving as a cleric, from what he recalls of the changeover, and yet he cannot pin down exactly when. He feels that should trouble him and knows that it would have in his younger days. Now he is used to it. Apparently it is how all Protoss get once they reach a century of age. That is not to say that an end is close. Far from it as Gossin feels he still has plenty of time left within his bones.

The cleric casts his gaze over the guard before him who looks nervous. Whether the nervousness is due to being in a cleric’s presence or what this youth has to say Gossin cannot be sure. He’ll learn soon enough which it is but his impression is that it is likely a mixture of both. He finds that concerning for a number of reason. None of those reasons will be revealed to the guard at any point however. Especially, as those amongst the ranks of the guards seem to be so easily perturbed in this modern era. Gossin isn’t even sure he should term it as such seeing as they are still within an era, which is how the first forms define a period of their history. Yet, he is fully aware that for a new era to be called as such a change has to occur. There has certainly been change for the Protoss, so perhaps this should be considered a new era. He doesn’t know and finds the longer he considers it and the more seconds that pass the more it really doesn’t seem to matter. The reality is that the word has lost much of its original meaning, like most things. Having settled such thoughts in his head he replies, finally. “And what o guardian of our time needs my attention?”

Gossin despises the flowery stupidity of how he’s supposed to commune with what is essentially a glorified butler at this point. And that isn’t the cleric being cruel or superior. It’s truth. Guards do a bit of ceremonial meandering to give a public show to the rest of the Protoss but for the most part they spend their time serving clerics every whim. It’s not something that has ever interested Gossin, which is why he seldom converses with their ilk. As a result that has earned him something of a reputation as a conservative. A first form stuck in an age long passed. The truth however is that Gossin is a self-sufficient soul and gets whatever he needs. Other clerics do not. He is fully aware of that and in reality it should be they who are termed conservatives not him.

Gossin’s self-sufficiency has become especially apparent since the death of his beloved Inara. A sigh passes his lips. He isn’t aware of it and the guard, though young, is well-versed enough to not react. Still, the guard cannot help but feel perhaps he should have gone to another. He quickly shakes such an idea out of his head while going over for the eightieth time why 3rd Cleric Gossin is the man who should be informed of this. He might be a staunch Protoss with a reputation as a conservative but at least he possesses a military background. He’s one of the few remaining clerics that does and yet what Protoss call military backgrounds are little more than a short period of training and study on the subjects.

Unless that is, you are a part of The Might, but no member of that cell would ever be permitted to enter the ranks of the Clerics, the leaders of Protoss. The Might are a tool, an outdated and archaic one to many first forms, and yet the Clerics have not disbanded them. No one is sure, not even the guards, as to why that is. It was what the guards had expected to occur, or so some of the elders had muttered amongst themselves when they thought none of the younger cadets were present.

Perhaps, a small few had suggested, the Clerics know something that they do not wish to share. A prophecy or foretelling that will one day come to pass. It seems unlikely and yet few openly speak on such matters. The few times they’ve been brought to the fore have seen them swiftly and unceremoniously dismissed as a matter for another era. For many of the older guards that had been all the proof they needed of things being hidden from them. Yet, it did not stir them enough to engage in active searches as to what that something might conceivably be.

“Man is moving again. They are encroaching. Soon they will be upon our doorstep.” The young guard with the purple eyes says from beneath his uniform of dark green and grey. The egg shaped headpiece perched and affixed atop his head by ways of a thin band that passes under the Protoss’ pointed chin.

Gossin raises his four digited left hand all so he can run it along either side of his chin in a stroking motion which he repeats over and over as if he has a beard. He doesn’t, and yet it is a display meant to suggest deep thought on his part. Though, Gossin is engaging in no such thing. He doesn’t need to be. He’s heard rumblings that man is closer than ever and even if he hadn’t the reports that land on his desk each day make frequent mention of them. Sightings are becoming ever more prevalent. Why this guard looks so worried though makes little sense to the cleric, much like the uniform he is dressed in.

All this makes Gossin wish he could know answers without questions but such things are not possible and so he asks, “Why does this concern you so greatly o guardian of our time?”

The cleric really has to resist the urge to roll his eyes at the flowery addition he must affix to his question as the words pass his lips. At least, he thinks, its automatic now. His response that is, and not the roll of his eyes. He manages to stop himself performing that. The guard wouldn’t understand the roll if it were performed and that would result in questions or chatter behind his back. He wishes for neither.

“They are armed.” The guard exclaims unable to keep himself in check any longer. Not that he was doing a particularly decent job of containing himself in the first place with his rapid shaking and short sharp nasal breaths.

“And?” Gossin queries unable to see the point that this guard might be attempting to make as it is normal for man to be armed. They go everywhere armed. In fact, it would more surprising if these specimens of their species were not. And that leads the cleric to another problem he has with Guards of this modern era, which isn’t one. They aren’t brave, fearless or knowledgeable in these current times. They are simply the descendants of descendants who joined to serve because it is what their families have done since… Gossin can’t say. It’s not an affliction that he has ever been burdened with. After all, his father, Janerus, had never been a military minded man. In fact he’d been a builder. A real grafter who had spent his days hulking heavy loads and then fixing them in place with tools, or his bare hands if needs be. As a result Janerus had not been thrilled when Gossin had conveyed to him that he intended on partaking in military training. Janerus had questioned the validity of such an avenue, but Gossin had been resolute in his commitment. And while his father was not convinced in the legitimacy of the path, he had been welcoming of his sons’ determination to follow a route of his own, even when it led him to join the Clerics. Though, when that time had come they did have a falling out which lasted a good several years and saw them speak not a word to one another. Chiefly his issue was because it meant his father was unsure as to whether, with his son counted amongst them, he still had the right to whine about decisions he did not agree with, rather than having an actual issue with the position itself.

“They…Well…” The guard is lost for words. His panic has overturned his ability to speak. The sentence, the statement he had rehearsed is gone. It’s lost. He sinks saddened by his faltering and considers what his own father would think. The now retired former Guard who if he were present witnessing this pathetic display of whimpering and snivelling would bellow at the top of his lungs that he, Veritus, needs to get a grip. To spit out whatever words he has confined within his lungs like a real guard would.

“Fear… You feel afraid. It is nothing to be ashamed of.” Gossin is lying, partially. Fear itself is nothing to be ashamed of except if you’re a guard that has let your imagination run wild, like appears to be the case here. As a result the cleric has to suppress such a statement from escaping his lips as it wouldn’t be welcomed. Though, it would be truthful. Guards, at least in the eras before, were confident and capable. What exist now are the descendants of those strong types and they possess few, if any, of those qualities from what he has witnessed. Whether they have been lost to time or simply moved to others Gossin cannot say. His belief is that it is the latter as The Might would not exist if it were the former. Yet, they have not faced battle in… Gossin cannot say. It has been too long and not long enough at the same time. After all, the last thing the light blue skinned 3rd Cleric wants is to return to an era of war. Loss is hard enough to endure without pointless violence over land. That is why man fights. They want land; something to conquer and lay claim to so that they may call it their own. It is clear they have forgotten that the land belongs to the world tree, to Yggdrasil, and that they are but guests here. There are no exceptions to that truth and yet the failure of the creator to remind man of its strength and divinity over them confuses Gossin. It’s why he has been questioning the texts of old recently, and wondering if the stories contained within them hold any fact. Current events suggest they do not. Yet, the cleric cannot bring himself to abandon them. Though, his thoughts have led him to wonder what, if anything, it is that man believes in. He will likely never know as it is unlikely that a Protoss and a human will sit down around the same table to converse anytime soon. Each treats the other with a healthy dose of wariness, in his opinion, and he hopes that continues even with man being so close by.

“But they number so many, and they are so close.” The guard gulps.

“They will pass soon. Venture to greener pastures with greater expanses. That is the way of man.” Gossin says bringing the conversation, if it can be termed as such, to a close. His words are meant to placate and assure the young guard before him. A smile drifts across his thin face soon after as his fingers fall into a steeple that mirrors and point toward the also steepled roof above his head. The one that is slathered with quick pale mud to help to keep moisture and heat from making this enclosed largely empty dimly lit space cool and bearable during the summer months.

Still, the guard, Veritus, at first does not accept the 3rd Cleric’s words. Rather, he stays rooted to the spot considering the statement that has been issued to him. Seconds tick by and soon turn to more than minute. Then finally Veritus accepts, begrudgingly, what the cleric has delivered to him as a comfort. At that point Veritus bows his head in thanks, spins on his heels, still unconvinced, and shuffles to the bland wood door. Once at it he grasps a hold of the knob, twists and wrenches the flat faced yellow coloured mass of wood toward him until the opening is wide enough for him to pass through. The light of day beyond the limits of this dull interior is saturated by the brightness of the rays that lance down from high above. Veritus feels the warmth of the sun, drinks it in and then steps over the threshold, closing the door behind him.

Gossin chuckles once to himself and shakes his head as he is also not convinced by the words that have passed his lips. Yet, it was all he could do. To do anymore might have inspired further panic in the young guard, and Gossin knows well that panic spreads like wildfire. He’s seen both in his life a number of times and the similarities are clear. Still, he isn’t about to do nothing either. He has concerns of his own. They predate this exchange with the guard. Perhaps they are the result of all the reports that have passed his desk. Or perhaps they are for other reasons which he would rather not consider any deeper currently. Regardless, he’ll put in a recommendation. It’ll be ignored. They always are. That is why he’ll also do some digging of his own. Secure the help of The Might to scout where neither he, as a cleric, nor the guards will be capable. It might take months, maybe even years. That that time however will afford him the opportunity to continue his push for The Might to replace the guards. It’s what needs to happen and is long overdue.

Knife’s Edge

Burn down corruption and feel nothing
Such is the way that things must be seen
If we don’t then we’ll just fade away
Humanity was never going out any other way
If you thought it was you were fooling yourself
This species is not in good health
Just a stain upon the crust
In those words you should trust
Cause once we’re gone it does not end
The Earth will keep on spinning
Many more millennia will come and go
Before our star changes so…
Think about what we can mold
If we don’t we won’t grow old
Time is short and you have a choice
Give those options with the loudest voice
Otherwise it’s time we slide
Raise our hand and wave goodbye

So-So

Wrapped in the madness of money
Will you stop when this ain’t funny?
Roll of the dice might kill tomorrow
Hiding in the shadows you always borrow
Still scrounge for absolutely nothing
This is how you love the end that’s coming
Probing at the new contamination
Enjoying the finale of the heartless nation
Pleading for another shot at fear
Ignore what you don’t want to hear
Abandoned by your own dreams
Victory by any kind of means
Guilt left you so long ago
Demanding opportunity is so-so
Trigger to which you abide
Cutting out with overjoyed pride
Ruthless husk of a new form
Steal and cheat from the day you were born

Short

I’ll run to the end but it won’t be enough
I hold on to the cup that has become only rust
The liquid within has dried to sand
Now all that’s left is a shaking withered hand

Cry to the moons of a forgotten sky
Watch as the wilderness sees you die
Can you honestly say that you did as you wished?
Or were you simply another spinning dish

Stare to the graves of all the damned
You will join them long before the end
Cause the world keeps spinning no matter what
So don’t let life just turn to nought

Fall And Rise

Clutch,
But you don’t have too much
Grip,
When it’s already started to slip
Hold on,
Now that it’s all gone

Stand firm,
Lets see if you can learn
Be strong,
Knowing right from wrong
Do better,
Like it says in the letter

Shout loud,
Don’t be part of the crowd
Your blip,
Not a time to flip
Focus,
And just simply show us

The fall,
Isn’t the end of all
Now crawl,
Until you reach the hall
Rise up,
Drink from this plain cup

Now join,
A life better than coin
Its new,
But its a part of you
Transcend,
This is the start of something

Born From Nought

Right, this week I have a story (roughly 12,000 words) in which the main character really doesn’t feature all that much. They’re at the centre of what happens but for the most part the story is told via those around said main character. Also, it’s more a story about people than it is the events. That’s all I’m going to say. Hope you enjoy it!

“…And that should be about done.” Narek Ozanian says with a wide smile split across his tanned face. A flurry of gesticulating motions help to further convey the man’s satisfaction and joy at what he has managed to create as he asses it.

Narek is sat inside a small industrial unit he’s been leasing for the last couple of years. It’s nothing special, in size or design, but it works well enough for him. Plus, it’s quiet and situated far enough out of the city that he is unlikely to be bothered by lost travellers or delivery drivers looking for this place or that. Such things had been a problem when he’d still been based out of one of the university buildings. That was before he’d had his funding cut and been forced to take a job as a street cleaner.

That sudden change in circumstance had been incredibly hard for Narek but he’d persevered and scrimped every dime he made until he could afford this unit. He lives out of it now as he determined his dream was more important than a home of his own. It hadn’t been his own anyway, it had been a rented fleapit and truth be told the industrial unit is far superior to it in almost every way. Though, it had needed some alterations, well additions really. The additions came in the form of dividing walls, heating, lights and some kitchen facilities. The only thing the unit had of use to him when he moved in had been the toilets. In fact, there were five toilet cubicles in total, two of men, two for women and one disabled.

It wasn’t easy for Narek to afford or implement such things, especially as he had no prior experience relating to how to build or install any of them. However, he’d managed and done it all himself, mainly to save some extra money that he didn’t really have to begin with. Though, it was money that he’d needed to spend if he wanted to stay self-sufficient, like he is now.

“Now to run a few tests before…” Narek trails off as he shoots across the polished shining concrete floor on the office chair. The chairs castors make a particularly loud ruckus due to the surface material which only ever amplifies sound when something travels across its silky smooth face.  At first the sounds of the castors, his feet, whenever he dropped something, etc had grated with the man who has short dark curly hair and rich brown eyes that sparkle. That sparkle in his eyes had not always been present. If you had looked at Narek moments after learning he was no longer going to be able to carry on his work at the university all you would have seen in them would have been sadness and loss. If you had asked Narek he would have told you that being given that news was like suffering a loss of a dear friend. It was, to him at that point, a massive blow to his confidence and suggested that perhaps his work was not worth pursuing. Yet, the university had not abandoned the field he was working within entirely. They simply explained that they could only afford to continue funding a single project, due to mounting costs, and that Doctor Herbert Tsimonis’ project was, on the face of it, so much further along and showed such promise that they decided backing him over Narek was a no-brainer.

“Shows what they knew.” Narek mutters under his breath, resentful, as he runs through the data being relayed to him on one of more than a dozen, total, monitors. The display in question is affixed to an arm that hangs down from a gantry of metal upon which the lower level lights are installed so that the square space that Narek uses as a workshop is properly illuminated.

Everything looks good. In fact, it looks better than good. It looks perhaps too good, he thinks for a moment before shaking himself lose of his doubts, chastising himself for failing to stay positive and then returning to reviewing the data. His overly cynical nature has been his downfall on many an occasion, but it got particularly bad after his ejection from the university. Months had passed during which all he’d done was mope. It was why his relationship broke down too. He understands that now. At the time however he’d been sure it was Jessa’s fault and not his own. He really should see how Jessa is doing. No you shouldn’t, she doesn’t want to talk. If she did she would have done o by now, he feels a part of him declare. He pushes it aside not wanting to consider such things or be distracted from his work.

“All looks good.” Narek concludes talking aloud to himself. It’s a habit he often partakes in. For him it helps to think and work through things, whether they are problems or just thoughts. Many have commented over the years, when he’d been at school especially, that it’s annoying and a habit he should get out of. Thankfully, a teacher of his, Curtis Winterbourne, had encouraged him to pay no mind and do whatever he felt comfortable with, especially if it gave him an edge. If his murmurings bothered others than that was something others would have to work through, is essentially what his point had been.

Narek had liked Mr Winterbourne; he’d been the best physics teacher a teenage boy could have asked for. He’s long since retired now. In fact, he shuffled out of work and into retirement once Narek’s year had moved on to college. They’d got back in touch years later, quite accidentally, and had a few long chats while at symposiums they both had interest in. Narek had even done a quick rundown of his work while they had been short on time during a bus ride from the hotel to a symposium venue. Curtis had been hugely interested but had admitted it was not in any way his field. He did make a lot of positive and encouraging statements however.

The tanned dark haired man alone in the industrial unit whooshes back the way he originally came on the castors of his office chair. The padding isn’t great following the long hours and several years of overly heavy use it has suffered through. But it still does the trick and sure as hell beats standing up all day every day. That is one thing Narek does not miss about working in a university lab or workshop. He thought it stupid and dangerous in itself but safety measures had denoted that seats, stalls, chairs and the like could be potentially hazardous and so were not permitted. That is why the break rooms existed was the justification tacked on at the end without the consideration that the break rooms were at the opposite end of the building and too small to provide adequate space for as many people as used the building.

Stopping back at the table Narek takes a moment to gaze upon the form before him. It is female in appearance with short brown hair and closed eyes. The figure however, the form, is in no way human. Narek calls her Allie as her full moniker is Artificial Life-Like Intelligence Engine. Another, simpler way of putting it would be that Allie is an android.

Narek refuses to call her a robot due to the negative connotations. After all, robot literally means forced labour or slave in old Slavonic. As an Armenian, Narek knows what it is like to be persecuted for what you are, so refuses to use any such terminology that could help perpetuate persecution onto Allie, and what he hopes will be the countless others that follow. Before that will ever happen he must first ensure that Allie is perfect. Not in a literal sense. That would be impossible. At least for him as a human being it would as humans themselves are not perfect and so, in his mind, cannot create perfection. After all, perfection comes from millions of years of evolution. Not a decade or more of work.

Instead, Narek has to make sure that Allie is perfect, or as close as possible to, in terms of her reactions and emotional states. After all, she could very well be the future of evolutionary development. That is, she could be in his eyes. He is not oblivious to the reality that corporations might want to use her for military or menial work though. They will. They always do have other ideas and schemes.

“Think it’s time to wake you up for the first rounds of tests Allie.” Narek mutters softly. She won’t react; she can’t, at least not yet. First he’ll have to activate her, which is what he does by reaching across her and then pressing a small dimple behind her right ear. He’ll have to disable and perhaps relocate it once Allie is fully up to speed. Once she is fully up to speed Narek has no intention of enabling and disabling her because that is not living. Rather, she should be allowed, in his mind, to live. He’ll have to make certain that her educational protocols and databases are up to date first, but that will take no more than minutes with the upload cable that is currently flowing out the back of Allie’s head. At a push he could use her remote data gathering functions too. Though, he prefers the cable. It’s more consistent and faster. Cables are always faster than wireless transfer.

The port in question into which the cable is slotted is located at the base of her skull and is part of the reason her hair is short. Narek is fully aware that such a look may not be to Allie’s preference, but her hair will ‘grow’ if she so wishes it to. And that is where Allie and humans, like Narek, will be different. Allie will have control over every part of herself and so will be able to change her appearance as she sees fit. That ability alone will likely make people jealous, Narek thinks as Allie finishes going through her boot sequence, a series of flickering images that flash past so fast that no human would ever be able to discern what they were/are.

Finally, Allie’s eyes open, they’re purple, a deep shade that marks her out, currently, as different. After all, no human can be born with purple eyes. Genetic manipulation, contact lenses, iris replacement therapy and other methods can artificially change that if a patient so wishes of course. Narek has never seen the point in such alterations, they add no benefits, and truth be told he likes his eyes as well as, for the most part, the rest of his appearance. He will admit though that has a few more wrinkles than a man of his age rightly should. He puts the presence of those wrinkles down to the stresses he’s been through, nearly all of which have been professional, relating to money and to his continued ability to living a life. He wouldn’t call it a comfortable one. If he did he’d be lying to himself. After all, what is comfortable about sleeping in a largely empty industrial unit where the walls and floor proper are concrete and the roof is formed from sheets of thick uninsulated metal? The answer is nothing, but it could be much worse he is fully aware.

“Allie…” Narek repeats due to Allie not yet done a thing other than open her eyes. As yet she, it is easier to refer to her that way even if she isn’t human, hasn’t moved a muscle.

Slowly Allie rises until she is sat upright. Her legs stay outstretched on the shining metal table that looks more like it is suited for autopsies than for sleeping on. I’ll have to fix that, Narek thinks to himself realising his first mistake in not treating Allie like he would any organic person. He finds that troubling but swiftly shoves such issues to the side, swearing he will be better and until he has a bed for her she can always take his bed. He’ll take the sofa, as lumpy and uncomfortable as it is. It’s the least he can do to ensure Allie has a proper introduction into the world.

Now that Allie is upright she turns, blinks a couple times and then smiles fully aware of the presence of Narek, who is sat facing her. The man returns the smile but utters right after, “How are you feeling Allie?” It’s a simple question and one he would, politely, ask anyone.

In response Allie blinks several times rapidly. It’s as if she is analysing Narek’s words and then cocks her head slightly to the right, clearly still deep in thought.

With her body side on to him her head cocked in the manner that it is looks to be at a more severe angle than it truly is. Still, he patiently waits for her to reply. She should be able to reply and yet he’s only just begun to consider, doubt really, whether he has properly activated all her systems. That doubt is why he feels himself about to turn away and crane his neck to look over his shoulder at one of the larger monitors. Just as he feels such a need Allie replies, “Odd Narek, I have to admit.”

Allie’s voice is soft and quiet, perhaps too much so. Narek will need to look into that. He doesn’t want her to appear small, even if she only stands at five foot three inches in height.

In truth the man isn’t sure as to why he settled on such a height for her. It had never been a conscious decision. At least it was not as far as he was aware when he had been printing the skeletal structure for her body. In fact, her skeleton is been based off of one of the specimens in the university. But not on the one that had been in his building. The skeleton he’d based it off had been situated in the building next door.

How odd, he thinks before realising he is yet to reply. He quickly shakes himself free of his thoughts, noticing that Allie is waiting patiently. A person likely wouldn’t have, Narek thinks before quickly asking, “In what way Allie?”

The synthetic woman, the android, considers the question for a time. Her head does not cock one way or the other on this occasion. However, she feels her pause is longer than it needs to be. It’s as if something is stopping her from answering as quickly as she is truly able to. So when she does speak she is honest and says exactly the thought that came to her within the blink of an eye, and after having run through everything that makes up her. “I seem to be slower than is necessary. Plus, I lack segments of myself. It’s seems as though there are gaps.”

“What? Really?” Narek exclaims prior to craning his neck just enough so that he can roughly see the monitor out the corner of his eye. Everything is showing active. As a result he frowns while still considering whether he might have missed anything that may be the cause of this…feeling Allie has.

“Who are you?” Allie then asks sweetly.

“I’m…sorry?” Narek blurts confused by the question that has caught him entirely off-balance. After all, Allie should know who he is. He programmed her to know him and yet it seems she does not. Most concerning, he thinks in the seconds before Allie speaks again.

“You seem familiar but I….How are you today?” Allie changes statement mid-sentence. Narek blinks. This is a first and not at all what he’d been waiting for, which is why he raises his left hand and rubs at his eyes with the middle finger and thumb of his right hand.

“Did I do something wrong? Am I… Good morning!” Allie blurts. She seems fragmented as if… Narek realises what he must have done and spins, rudely, away from Allie. His turn passes a hundred and ninety degrees before he stops to peer intently at the screen. This monitor is smaller than he would like and from this distance, about eight metres, he is forced to squint.

Nearly a full minute later, during which Allie his rambled almost unintelligibly, he spots the culprit causing this behaviour. Narek sighs frustrated with himself. His shoulders drop and to be honest all he wants to do is scream. Even though he knows the mistake is due to him being tired and having spent, as far as he is aware, the last eighteen hours working.

In reality, he’s been awake twenty seven hours, but has counted a five minute nap as a sleep. He doesn’t recall that he only got a brief respite before returning to his work. Yet, it doesn’t change the fact that he forgot to recompile Allie’s code. Still, what’s done is done now, which is why he quickly rubs his face, forces a smile to break across it and then spins back round to face Allie.

The android with short brown hair is sitting patiently, her legs now dangling over the inclined edge of the table. It must be uncomfortable, Narek thinks as Allie lightly kicks her legs back and forth. It’s very much the sort of action a child would perform and may indicate that Allie is also humming a tune to herself. Narek can’t be sure of that, though the rhythm of her kicks suggests she is, which stuns him. He never imagined his failure might result in a natural occurrence of developing personality. Still, he will need to shut Allie down, recompile her code, unload it and recommence testing. It’s regrettable and fills him with more than a little sadness.

Allie takes that of the sadness on Narek’s face and enquires, “Why do you look sad?” The android woman has her head inclined so severely that it is almost against her right shoulder. Yet it is her voice that catches Narek off-guard, and knocks him out of his thoughts. It’s a sharper blow, he can’t think of a better way to describe it, than he’d anticipated and sees him explain, “Because I wish we could talk more.”

“We can. What do you want to…? Good evening.” Allie fragments again. It’s proof that at this stage they will not be able to converse any further than they have already managed thus far, sadly.

“Lie down Allie please.” Narek orders in as soft a voice as he can achieve.

“Okay.” Is the reply Narek is met with in the seconds prior to Allie swinging her legs back onto the hard silvery table and then pivoting at the waist again until she is laid out flat once more.

“Is this a game?” Allie asks quite curiously.

Narek stops and frowns confused. But he doesn’t answer, at least not at first. Rather, he considers why and where such a statement might have come from. He hasn’t a clue. He does feel that perhaps he should dig through her code and see how such a query has been uttered before simply overwriting her, with what on surface appears to be the miraculous development of spontaneous intelligence, with the recompiled code.

“Yes Allie it is. Now close your eyes and count, in your head, down from ten.” The curly haired man utters as he studies Allie. She is without a single item of clothing to cover her body. He’ll dress her before he next activates her. It seems only right now that she is fully assembled and seemingly working. Though, perhaps I should test her full skeletal and muscle structure first, Narek thinks for a few moments prior to banishing the idea.

As Allie counts down from ten, passing six and getting as far as four, Narek has circled around her and depresses the dimple behind her right ear. Allie deactivates. It’s instant. Her limbs, her body, go limp suddenly. It’s like she’s been punched in the jaw and rendered unconscious in that moment with a knockout blow, except without the violent strike itself, or any of the after effects.

With the android deactivated Narek looks at the watch on his wrist. It reads two in the morning and at the sight of the hour Narek feels incredibly tired. It’s as if his energy has been suddenly sapped. That is why he feels inclined to get some rest, a couple hours at most, and then return to his work. Thankfully, he hasn’t got work in the morning as he’s on leave.

Life Is A Ride That Keeps On Spinning

Stuck on the merry-go-round
My head is beginning to pound
Dizzy from the spin
Vision is blurring
Just like life
You can get lost sometime
But don’t simply give in
Keep on pushing
Aim for the next goal
Doesn’t matter if its big or small
What matters is that you care
And don’t just sit there
Staring at the empty walls
Wondering how you came to fall
Such a thing is not the point
You need to move forward
Look toward the shining light
Whatever makes you feel bright
Ignore all the shots of dark
It always looks so stark
Instead just get off the ride
Take a breath and choose your side
Then just walk on by
Don’t listen to the questions why
You don’t owe them a thing
Its up to you how you’re living

Tightening

I wrap my hands around my heart
Fear is always prepared to start
Another shot into the vein
Life feels like an endless chain
Coiling round until your stuck
What to do when it’s up
Are we supposed to run the race?
Keep going forward with our disgrace
Writhe around like empty souls
Waiting until we grow old
If that’s the case then I forego
I don’t want to be a part of that show
It’s not my place or my path
I’d rather stay than be lost in wrath
But what comes next you have no say
Time is ticking so far away
Instead the walls are closing in
No chance to breathe new life again