Misdirection

Will you listen to reason?
Or just keep stealing
Hold a torch to the flame
Instead of just blame
Walk a mile in my shoes
And not keep moaning
Or are just too busy stoning?

There are no clouds in the sky
But you keep say they’re coming
You sat for a while
And I don’t see anything
Do you even believe…
A single word you’re saying?
Or are you simply just flapping?

I have no time for claims
But you still keep them coming
A life lived in chains
Refusing to help with your brains
Staring at the clock
How much time have you got?
But I get no answer to any of it

So just start at the end
The only part you can’t bend
Walls are closing in
No proposition
Just a smile in a flash
No way to go back
Why won’t you say a thing about that?

Gods Or Monsters

There is a place deep inside the skin
The one from which our life is flowing
But instead of aiming to make it strong
All we do is keep carrying on
Taking shots to kill our brain
Unravelling in all our pain

Are we the monsters?
Cause we are not gods
Are we the demons?
We keep on screaming

Down in the depths where so many hide
There are the tales of life gone awry
We’ve heard them all but do not a thing
Instead we simply carry on living
Ignore the disaster heading our way
Soon we will be forced to pay

Are we the monsters?
Cause we are not gods
Are we the demons?
We keep on screaming

Misalign and forever refuse to fix
All of this is deep in the mix
Not a soul fighting hammer and tong
We are everything that could be wrong
Just selfish wrapped in skin
The cause of each massive failing

Are we the monsters?
Cause we are not gods
Are we the demons?
We keep on screaming

Fade out and finally die today
That might be what’s best really
Just a contagion without a cure
Nothing left could be called pure
Simply a wound open and weeping
We are the epitomy of cruel bleeding

Are we the monsters?
Cause we are not gods
Are we the demons?
We keep on screaming

Another line drawn in the sand
Nothing we do will ever be grand
Too busy fighting in our own heads
Wishing that each other was dead
What a waste of precious time
Not a being can claim to be fine

Death Of Gods

I’m here again with another Wednesday story post. And this time I have a long one for all of you (about 21,000 words). It was never intended to be as long as it is but I got a little carried away. Anyway enough of that. This is a story about how power can corrupt and what happens when it does. It’s a violent and twisted tale as a result and so without further delay I give you, Death Of Gods.

There is a gentle wrapping, three times, upon a badly faded white painted wooden door. The door has clearly seen better days as sections of the white paint are missing from the corners, as well as along small strips at the edges. These flecks of missing paint reveal glimpses of the dark wood stain underneath, while the doorframe itself has begun to yellow due to years of neglect.

The reddish brick walls the frame is fastened to reveal nothing of interest other than that the building is of an older construction. You see, bricks aren’t used anymore when building within the confines of this city. The reasoning behind it is simple, time and money. After all, brick buildings require not only an army of workers to lay and level the bricks, but also an entirely separate and nearly as populous group to facilitate in that process by doing things such as transporting the very same materials around site, or by helping to mix the cement that keeps them bound together as they are stacked atop one another.

By contrast, metal frameworks are quick and easy, and though their initial cost is much higher, the speed with which they can be erected more than makes up for it.

However, let’s return to the door. After all, someone has knocked upon it on from out in the corridor. The same corridor that not only links all the apartments on this floor together, but that also in turn links to the stairwell which runs the full height of this building.

But, seeing as there has been no response to the gentle triple wrap from anyone inside the apartment, another stronger quick succession of knocks is soon delivered.

This time the response is a groan and it comes a short while before Hayden Wilkes, more commonly known as Headshot, shifts his muscular two hundred and eight centimetre tall frame from the stained brown couch he’d been laid upon and over to the door. Once there he slides the paint stripped security bolts, all four of them, back before grabbing a hold of the door knob and then wrenching the door open to enquire, “What?”

Almost immediately Hayden takes note that the person responsible for knocking on his door is a pizza delivery guy. He looks young, barely old enough to drive. His face littered with red spots marking him out as an adolescent. And to make matters worse his face also shines under the overhead lights of the corridor.

The pizza guy is dressed in a colourful jacket meant to suggest that whatever pizzeria he is from has links back to Italy. Hayden has no clue whether it does or not as he doesn’t particularly care.

But, at the sight of Hayden the pizza boy gulps. The guy before him is huge and angry looking as he stares with blue eyes right at the delivery guy who feels like maybe he should just run off without saying a word. He doesn’t know why he always gets the big angry folk who always seem ready to break his bones when they open the door. Why can’t he run into a girl, a guy like him or some little kids? Everyone else that does deliveries for Franco’s Pizzeria seems to. Or at least that is what they claim. He has no way of knowing for sure if any of what they say is true, after all.

“A-are you…Hayden Wilkes?” The pizza guy stutters finally.

The silence before he spoke was long and by the increasingly furrowed look on Hayden’s face he is sure this not only has to be the guy, but that if he had delayed talking any longer he might have ended up with a fist in his face. It wouldn’t be the first time that has happened to him. Not by a long shot.

“Yeah, who’s asking?” Hayden replies as he flexes his wide jaw. His flame red hair bristling slightly due to the corridor window that still hasn’t been fixed. Not that Hayden cares. After all, you get what you pay for and this apartment complex is a dive. It didn’t used to be but that’s what happens when dedicated people sell out to shady characters. Still, the new owners know better than to mess with this former boxer. That’s mainly because he’d made his point early on, back when they’d tried to up his rent to five times its current price without reason or thought. There’s no chance they’ll do that again, especially after Hayden made sure that one of the brothers will have to eat through a straw for the rest of his natural life.

“I have a pizza for you sir.” The delivery guy comes back in the awkward moments following a loud gulp that Hayden could hear. The former boxer resists the urge to smirk as he continues to look down, quite literally, at the teenager he guesses is about one hundred seventy centimetres in height and probably sixteen years of age.

“I didn’t order a pizza kid.” Hayden rumbles in response.

He is even about to slam the door right in the pizza guys’ face when the boy announces, “Apartment Forty Seven of Bay Bell Apartments Complex, number Nine South Albert Avenue. That’s the address I was given along with the name Hayden Wilkes.”

Hayden stops, his shoulders drop and he grumbles audibly. In response the pizza boy gulps again and then begins to fidget on the spot. His feet shuffle nervously from side to side as he anticipates being met with a blow to the face, or maybe the gut. He’s ready for it. Well, he’s expecting it. He’ll never be ready to take it.

In fact, there’s a good chance that if this Hayden guy tries to he might be able to punch my head off, the pizza delivery guy, named Drew, thinks. Drew hopes that is not what is about to happen. He really doesn’t want to die today. There are plenty of things he wants to do before he meets his maker and it’s why he still wonders whether he should just run, without saying another word. He could even leave the pizza. He doesn’t care. The job isn’t worth his life.

Nearly twenty seconds pass before Hayden turns back to the kid. He can’t argue that he has the right name and address. Though, Hayden did not order a pizza. He knows that for a fact. Still, it’s here now and inhaling the delicious smell of the food is making him hungry so, as fast as lightning, he snatches the square cardboard box out of the boys’ hands. It was his own fault for having hold of the pizza as if he was about to present it. In all fairness that is the norm, but still the sudden swipe catches Drew off-guard. It’s why he jumps, almost out of his skin and through the cream coloured ceiling above.

“Th-that’ll be thirty seven fifty sir.” Drew stutters sheepishly while looking off to the side. He no longer feels able to maintain eye contact with the giant of a man before him. And to make matters worse sweat is starting to bead down his forehead.

Hayden resists the urge to curl his top lip in disgust and then slam the door in the kids face. Instead he asks, “Do you know who I am?”

Drew shuffles on the spot and then finally shrugs. It’s an admittance that he hasn’t a clue who Hayden is. The big man laughs, his voice booms loudly, filling the air. Then without warning he throws a punch with his left fist.

The strike hits Drew square in the middle of his face and spends his body flying backward into the opposite wall of the corridor. The force of the impact results in a massive boom, while his body creates a crater that shatters the plaster covering the thick red bricks underneath.

The body hangs in the air for a few moments, still embedded in the crater and then finally drops, limply to the rough wooden floor with a hard dull thud. The pizza delivery guy, Drew, is dead. His face is punched in, flattened, slightly caved as a result.

This is Hayden’s trademark. It’s how he came to be known as Headshot. And to be honest, whether the kid knew who he was or not this is how it was always going to end, especially after the price of the pizza was mentioned.

No repercussions will come from the death though, which is why Hayden sniffs loudly once, turns and then with a single slap sends his apartment door slamming shut with a loud bang.

With privacy and solitude returned to Hayden he licks his lips greedily in anticipation of gorging himself on the pie inside. He hasn’t a clue who ordered it or what kind of pizza it is. He hopes its pineapple and mushroom one as that’s his favourite. But to be honest he’ll devour any kind now that he’s feeling as ravenously hungry as he is.

However, before he gets to the kitchen area of his barely furnished and bland apartment he finds he isn’t alone. Instead, there is a woman standing right in his path, blocking him. In an instant his face twists into a snarl and just in time for him to bark demandingly, “Who are you? And what are you doing in my apartment?”

Hayden’s voice is loud and booming as he speaks. His free hand meanwhile, balls into a fist ready for a fight. It won’t be a fight. He knows that for a fact. After all, his fists are harder than rock and no matter what this woman says she’s going to be the next to join his tally of kills for having invaded his home.

But the woman says nothing. Instead, she just stands there. Her long straight black hair with its green tints almost reaches down to her waist, while her eyes glare at him angrily.

Hayden has never seen her before in his life and if the light were better in his apartment he might be able to take note that her eyes are differing colours. With one of her eyes being blue in colour, while the other is a vibrant green.

However, because the woman says nothing Hayden feels it necessary to make a point. So he casts the pizza aside and then balls up his other fist. It’s a display meant to scare her. A silent threat to illustrate that he’s ready and willing to fight. In truth he’s spoiling for one. Though he does query, “How did you get in here? We’re on the twentieth floor.”

For the second time Hayden gets no response. It’s why he shrugs before long and then feeling in no danger whatsoever, he strides over to the woman only stopping when he is right up in her face. Except his face is high above her head and he is forced to crane his neck downward to glare at her, while she is forced to do the exact opposite to look up at him. Her eyes are angry, he notes.

“Speak or die, little flower.” Hayden says through gritted teeth as his voice rumbles.

He gets no verbal reply. Rather, the woman with long black hair who is clad entirely in black lets a thin wide smile break across her otherwise tightly pressed lips.

Hayden grunts in response and then prepares to throw a punch. However, the woman reacts first as she, lightning fast, brings her knee up and into Hayden’s groin. The impact is full force and perfectly placed. Hayden feels the sting of agony that can only come from being hit in the crotch less than a second later.

His response is automatic and unfettered as he explodes into a primal roar and then staggers back a couple metres before almost bending double. He even cups his large hands around his injured and throbbing privates.

It doesn’t take long for his pain to turn to anger. It’s why he begins cursing relentlessly at the woman unable to fashion any form of coherent reply for nearly a minute. But once he feels able to string words together because the pain has eased, he announces, “I promise I’ll make you pay for that you little bitch!”

Then without warning he throws himself into a lunge, leading with his once again balled up right fist. He’s heading straight for the woman and smiles as the distance between them lessens and lessens until he reaches his target. Except, his target is no longer there. Hayden doesn’t understand. She was right there less than a second ago. His fist should have crushed her face flat, ending her insolent life in an instant.

The big hulking giant of a man doesn’t get it. All he did was blink and then she was gone. But he feels her presence behind him now. It makes no sense how that can be possible, but on instinct alone he does an about turn and finds that the long haired woman really is stood right before him. His brow furrows for a second and then begins to twist into a snarl as he prepares to wind himself up for another strike. However, the woman lashes out first with a slash across his face.

Hayden feels the quadruple burn immediately, while his head is snapped right due to the force of the strike.

Deep gashes have been torn through the flesh of his cheek. Blood flung wide as he spins away in retreat while howling a pained cry similar, in pitch, to what you might hear from a wolf.

Now that he is away from his attacker and he is sure he is out of her reach, his first instinct is to bring his hand up and touch his face. He does exactly that. Though, he makes sure to probe carefully, which is why he dabs at his cheek and then pulls back his hand to gaze upon the smears of red that now coat his fat fingers.

Hayden can imagine what his face must look like now. But instead of fear or concern he feels only the familiar boil of unbridled rage as red mist descends removing any hope of rational thought from the large man.

A second later he begins to spit and growl, as if he is some kind of rabid beast desperate for blood. It lasts a while and melds with his heavy breathing, not the result of exhaustion or fatigue but anger. Anger which he can contain no more and so, without warning, he explodes into a teeth barred charge.

Hayden is headed right for this woman. He hasn’t a clue who she might be, why she is here or what she hopes to achieve. He tried gaining answers to those questions but she refused to speak. It is possible she cannot speak. But Hayden doesn’t care. He gave her the chance and she didn’t take it. Instead, she attacked him. He’d be impressed if it were not for the fact that she has caused him actual pain and humiliation. In his eyes no one gets the drop on Hayden ‘Headshot’ Wilkes, and if they do they don’t live long enough to get the chance to brag about it.

Suddenly, the woman spins away avoiding Hayden’s wild and reckless charge. A charge that sees him go barrelling headfirst into a wall right after due to him having too much momentum to have any hope of pulling up in time to avoid the impact. And though, as a result of the blow his vision is filled with tiny sparkling stars, he still manages to spin on the spot and demand, “Fight me with honour!”

“And why would I do that when you, Headshot, have none of your own?” The woman says with a soft mocking tone as she stares at him with her large eyes.

Hayden snorts derisively and then throws himself at the woman again following a quick shake of his head. Except this time he leads with a fist instead of charging at her with reckless abandon like he did before.

Again the woman avoids the first, second and then third swipes from Hayden before countering with her own fist which goes slamming hard into his gut.

The force of her strike is shocking to Hayden who in response goes staggering back a couple steps, perplexed by what has just transpired.

The pain in his gut is the only thing keeping him in the here and now. If it wasn’t present then he’d be mulling over how it can be possible that this diminutive woman is able to do this to him. It shouldn’t be possible. He knows that. Then he realises the pain is gone. Not entirely, but enough. And with it goes his focus on the here and now. It’s why his mind quickly presents the possibility that the only way it can be possible is if this woman, whoever she is, is like him. She can’t be. He knows everyone of the souls who became Gods to humanity and she was not one of them.

So he is left with a need to know how a mere mortal is standing against him. After all, he kills mortals. They’re weak, easy prey, no match for a man of his calibre. He was like them once until he joined the program all those years ago. The one that gave him these gifts and thus allowed him to become so much more than the rest of humanity could ever hope to be.

Suddenly he is pulled out of his thoughts as he hears the woman’s sweet voice remark mockingly, “Aw, what’s wrong? Did little ole me hurt you?”

A wry smile breaks across her previously pursed lips in the moments before Hayden growls and then charges for a second time.

The one thing the former boxer turned God cannot abide is being mocked. It inflames his temper in a manner no other thing in the world can achieve. And though his actions might seem brash, he is sure he has her this time. There is no way she is getting away from him, even though he hasn’t a clue how she did so before. After all, dodging punches thrown your way is one thing but literally vanishing from view less than a second before an impact only to reappear behind your attacker should be impossible.

Yet, just as Hayden is about to reach the woman, who he is sure is well within his grasp, she disappears. His eyes go wide as he tries to understand how this is possible. He doesn’t get very far with such thoughts though as many something’s, perhaps a dozen of them, go stabbing into his back. They plunge deep, and though they seem ready to tear him apart he instinctively roars and then whips round baffled by what might have been unleashed upon him. It has to be a weapon of some form. It’s the only explanation he can give.

However, as his eyes come back into focus after the frantic whipping around of his head, he spies the woman’s fingers. They’re long. No they’re impossibly long and dripping with blood. It has to be his blood. It wasn’t there before and the only person with any wounds is Hayden.

He goes to speak, to ask why her fingers are as they are. They hadn’t been before. Then he notes that they aren’t her fingers at all but her fingernails and that they’re shaped like talons, razor sharp and black in colour.

Hayden recoils in shock. He can scarcely believe it. Though it is without a doubt true and on many levels makes complete sense that she is a God. That she is like him. It’s the only possibility that makes sense as to how it is that she may be able to best him. Yet, the revelation leaves him with new questions, as God’s don’t fight God’s. Only mortals fight amongst themselves. Its part of the agreement each of them swears to abide by before they have the gifts they so rightly deserve, in their eyes, bestowed upon them.

That’s why Hayden utters in disbelief, “You’re like me. But who are you?”

The woman with green tints in her otherwise long black hair replies in disgust, “I am nothing like you and the other Gods.”

Her expression is the epitome of disdain, while her eyes burn defiantly with such intensity that it seems to Hayden that if it were real then it might actually be able to scorch him to death.

He’s impressed by her; even though there is no doubt that she has to die, now more than ever. Before she was just an insolent soul baying for death. Now she is a betrayer whose only sentence for her attempted crimes can he death. Those are the thoughts that go through his head in the moments before he replies, “All Gods are the same.”

Then he charges one last time. His arms outstretched, his fists balled. She’s arrogant. Too arrogant, he thinks, and he’ll catch her off guard now that he knows what she is. She’ll never be expecting him to un-ball his fists and reach for her, but that is precisely what he’ll do. She’ll never see it coming until it’s too late and she is within his grasp. Then he’ll snap her neck. It isn’t right or proper, but she started this. He has the wounds to prove it. The others will not question him. They know him.

Meanwhile, as Hayden charges toward her the woman declares, “We are nothing alike.”

She waits for him to get close and then springs her trap. A swift, lightning fast, kick to his chest. The force of the impact sends Hayden flailing backward, spinning round as he goes. That gives the woman all the opportunity she needs, which is why she then effortlessly leaps across the room, slashing with her talons as she sails gracefully through the air.

Hayden’s eyes go wide. He feels the gashes immediately but cannot react before a choke and several gargles escape his now tattered throat.

Blood pours from the remains of his neck. It sprays down the previously white vest covering his wide muscular chest and onto the floor. He can’t speak, though he tries. His voice box has been carved into pieces and though his hands are now up and around the wound it is already too late. Hayden has lost too much blood. A wide and still expanding puddle of thick dark red blood now covers a section of the polished black and white checkerboard floor of his apartment.

Hayden manages several awkward steps toward the woman before his legs become too weak to support his weight because of the amount of blood he’s lost. So he goes stumbling back into a wall. He stands with his back up against the blank section of light blue painted plaster staring at the woman until his legs fail completely and he goes slumping down to the floor. His eyes remain glued to the woman who simply watches as the last shreds of life leave him as evidenced by the fact that his eyes go glassy and still.

Cataloging

Cross the names off of the list
Perpetual state of won’t be missed
Tie the noose around the stone
Send them down to the depths below
One more trick up the sleeve
No one here remembers reprieve
Just an outline etched in chalk
Because of the person they did stalk
Drove the madness right off the bend
Can you not simply comprehend?

Well it seems the damage is already done
Sick of seeing the unending of everyone
Shuffle through the deck of cards
While surrounded by all the guards

A day late to make amends
The cycle is starting once again
Can’t there be a reset to end it all
Begin from a point not drenched in war

A bitter taste in the mouth
It is moving down to the south
Burning out the esophagus
Funeral of the life lost

Batten down the hatches and say goodnight
This is only the beginning of the fright
One more day is not the truth
Locked deep inside this cramped booth

Turn The Key

Creeping in the halls of pain
Another trophy calls your name
Shouting dreams of heresy
Can the future ever be free?
As the clock does strike twelve
Sing for revolution bells
For a night without falling shells
You pay the piper to end the spell

Dillusions of a broken mind
The world will never be so kind
Spectres of a broken soul
Watch as you lose control

Bearing gifts to the long departed
Fractured by the newly ignited
Few things ever scratch the itch
As your hope turns to a stitch
Scar tissue that seems unreal
Hands out to accept the deal
Stamped in the virgin blood
Another curse begins the flood

Dillusions of a broken mind
The world will never be so kind
Spectres of a broken soul
Watch as you lose control

Now repeat after me…
or you will never be free
Scratching, Scraping
Turn the key
Enter into misery
Calling, Balling
Open the door
There really is no cure

Delusions of a broken mind
The world will never be so kind
Specters of a broken soul
Watch as you lose control

Extremist

Freedom fighter, terrorist
Just a matter of perspective
Even if you use another name
They all link just the same
Insurgent is another term
Much like being a militant
All claim its for rights and fairness
But murder shouldn’t be permitted
If you kill then you are the cause
Another criminal outside the laws
Soldiers without a uniform
Little more than hell spawn
Cutting down who you “defend”
Just so you can lie again
After all you’re just extreme
And your victory is a dream
But never forget you won’t succeed
The majority will never aid your breed

Vended

These things that you have vended
I realise that I did not comprehend it
Too busy staring at the view
While all this time you were losing parts of you

Monsters hide, in every corner
A shattered position, from which to mourn her
I feel like, garbage rolling down the road
Not a single second, did I decide to own…
Up to the fact, that you were distant
Instead I simply, gave excuses for it
Tried to play off, all of the signs
Pretending like, it was all fine
But had I looked, then I would have seen
Everything was, a long way from serene
Cause instead of, enjoying each new day
You were wishing, it would finally fade away

These things that you have vended
I realise that I did not comprehend it
Too busy staring at the view
While all this time you were losing parts of you

Down on my knees, I begged for forgiveness
Even though, I was a witness
Too consumed, by all of the lights
My star shattered, right from the inside
That is why, I have no words to say
And why I’m, just standing here today
If I’d have thought, then I could have helped
Instead all I did, was add to the way you felt
And apologies, won’t fix a thing
That moment has passed, out of being
Instead I am, the one you should blame
Cause I never did a thing, to help with your pain

These things that you have vended
I realise that I did not comprehend it
Too busy staring at the view
While all this time you were losing parts of you

Far And Further Away

Back again with another story. A Sci-Fi story, set in space. It revolves around one woman and her starships navigational computer system. It’s about 11,300 words long. So without further ado, here is Far And Further Away.

The view beyond the canopy of the Transit class freighter is the same in this part of the galaxy as it is any other. A canvas of black, deeper shade of black than can be found anywhere else, and it’s speckled with tiny white dots. These tiny dots shine and sparkle like diamonds under a light. It’s a sight that Carmen Hollingrey has come to know very well. It doesn’t impress her like it had in her youngest days when she used to look up at the night sky. But that’s to be expected. No one can keep hold of the feelings they held when they were young and truly seeing or studying something for the first time. It just isn’t possible. Still, there is nowhere Carmen would rather be than here.

Space is her refuge. Her space in outer space is what keeps her from feeling claustrophobic and contained. She doesn’t know how most people cope with being tightly packed together on space stations or in cities. None of that is for her. She can make passing, fleeting visits at best to those places, but the thought of living in them day after day causes her anxiety. There’s a chance she might be able to get used to it if she had to, but she doesn’t.

The green eyed woman, the sole organic member of her freighters crew, blinks slowly and shifts her gaze away from the sight beyond the centimetres thick of metal weaved glass, while her flame red hair is tied back in a ponytail. It’s how she almost always has her hair. Mostly it’s for practicality, though she refuses to disregard it’s presence entirely. She likes having long hair. She’s had it since she was a teenager. Before that it had been short and in her opinion, it had never suited her. In fact, she can’t even remember why it had ever been as short as it was. She expects it had something to do with her parents. They were the overbearing sort and in no way agreed with her wish to become a freighter pilot hauling cargo from one planet or system to another. But Carmen had made her decision and though they didn’t view it as an appropriate career path she followed it nonetheless. For people born in the twenty third century they were incredibly old fashioned and believed manual work was beneath a woman. It’s why to this day Carmen doesn’t get along that great with her parents. Though, since she purchased her own ship and started working contracts negotiated using nothing but her own wit, their perspective has shifted a little. They still don’t agree with her life choice; however they cannot say that she has not been successful at it.

Still, none of that matters now as Carmen shifts from side to side in her pilots’ seat to make sure her back hasn’t locked or gone numb from the hours of sitting in one single position. It hasn’t and Carmen is relieved to conclude that, even if her brown jumpsuit with dark green shoulder sections is beginning to irritate her ever so slightly. It’s why in an attempt to take her mind off the irritation she asks the only other member of her crew, NIGEL, “How long until we drop out of FTL?”

The response from the other member of the freighters crew is, “Seven seconds.”

The voice is synthetic but warm. Some find the vocalised nav systems creepy or grating, but Carmen isn’t fazed by its presence in the slightest. In fact, it’s a welcome companion. After all, it makes no mess, generally doesn’t go for idle chit-chat, doesn’t intrude on her space, as it doesn’t have a physical presence, and never, ever tries to get her into bed. That is probably the biggest benefit of all. And Carmen wishes she could say the same about the countless station Dockers and flyboys that she comes across. It’s why each time it happens she can’t help but roll her eyes and why she likes to spend as little time docked as possible.

Instead of bedding down on the stations or in the ports she often instead waits for the cargo to be unloaded and a fresh stock stowed away before making an immediate withdrawal. And that is whether it’s during the day, if she is on a planetary body, or in the dead of night. She can always sleep in space. It isn’t hard once you get used to it. Though, it is chilly even with the onboard heaters her ship has. And there have been times when she’s awoken, mid sleep cycle, to find herself chilled to the bone and able to visibly see her breath. The temperature poses her no danger, at least in the short term, and with the irregularity with which it occurs. Though, it does remind her that she needs to get the heater checked out at some point as it is becoming a more and more common occurrence, and the last thing Carmen wants is too risk the chance that one day the heater doesn’t fire and she sleeps through it never to wake again. In the redheads eyes that would be a depressing and embarrassing way to die.

Suddenly the freighter drops out of FTL. The ship jerks forward as it decelerates sharply. The straps on Carmen’s seat hold her in place, eliminating the possibility of her being chucked forward into the instrument panel ahead of her. She wonders how many, especially in the early days of FTL, failed to ensure these things were adorned. She imagines a lot and can picture both men and women being flung out of their seats, head first, into the instrument cluster. To a point it’s comical and causes a smile to flash across her face. But at the same time must be excruciatingly embarrassing as well as mildly painful. After all, the deceleration from FTL isn’t severe enough for the resulting impact from such a mistake to be fatal. At least that has been the reality during her lifetime, anyway. Whether that has always the case she cannot say and doubts anyone is still alive from the time that they might be able to confirm or deny such things. It’s why she now abandons the thought and instead orders, “NIGEL, give me a full systems check please.”

Carmen’s takes note of how the previously tiny white specks that had been dashes because of the FTL travel have returned to being perfect circles. She then reminds herself that the characterisation of the lights, which are stars, being circles is entirely incorrect. However, from here in this seat, that is exactly how they look. Hell, most of them are probably be long dead, or in a different phase of their life cycle compared to how they are appearing to her now. It’s a sad thought, Carmen thinks, even if she cannot explain why.

“Carmen, I am a navigational system, not an AI.” The synthetic male-esque reply says over the speakers built into every section of the freighter.

Thankfully, the nav system knows better than to speak through all of them at once. It’s a learned behaviour, not an automatic one. When Carmen had first had the system installed in her ship it had been unable to grasp that there was no purpose to have all speakers active at once when it answered because she is the only organic life-form onboard.

It had taken months for Carmen to train the computer system to accept that and during that time she had suffered many headaches and migraines because of the echoing reverb of the synthetic voice throughout the hull of her ship.

“Never said you were, but I know you can do it, so please just get on with it. There’s no need to retread this old ground again.” Carmen says rolling her eyes.

For a non-AI navigation system NIGEL, short for Navigational Interface and Guidance Establishment Logic System, seems to have more personality than many people she’s come across. That’s no surprise to Carmen seeing as many of the people she’s comes across are little more than grunting brutes only able to think a single thought at a time. It’s a cruel approximation of people but one she finds accurate and has seen reinforced many a time.

The view ahead of the freighter is no longer empty space now however, as they are coming up on Platform Six. The massive hulking space station is an orbital silo that is more than three miles in length and a little under a mile wide. It’s shaped like a cylinder with a flat ring encircling it at a little under the half way point between the top and bottom. Its surface is grey but marked by small black splashes where items of debris have impacted its composite hull plating. The impact cause no real damage, other than the black scoring on the metal surface that is visible. If any actual structural damage were to be caused then that entire section of the station would be evacuated, depressurised and repaired. The engineers could carry out repairs while the section is still pressurised, but they wouldn’t. Safety protocols insist a section is vented so that there is a zero likelihood of an explosive decompression occurring, which could result in a loss of life.

Platform Six is Carmen’s next stop on her charter. It’s an installation she visits often. In fact, she visits it weekly, at least at the moment she does anyway. Because of that she has been forced, more than a few times and more than she would have liked, to bed down for the night on the station.

“All systems are well within tolerances.” NIGEL comes back without warning. Not that he needed to give one and even if he did it is not like he was made aware of such a fact. Yet, it is clear, even from his synthetic voice, that he is feigning exhaustion at having to carry out such a task. He isn’t an AI, as he often likes to point out, and yes such things are supposed to be handled by one of the more advanced system but Carmen doesn’t have an AI. This freighter cost her all the money she’d saved up from the jobs she’s been doing over the years before she purchased it. And NIGEL, well he’d cost her a little more than she’d managed to save in the time since the purchase of the freighter.

It’s part of the reason why she’s been doing so many runs. She has to pay off the excess. If she doesn’t she’ll be landed with a massive request for additional payments due to missing deadline for the entire balance to be paid off by. Not that any of that is NIGEL’s problem. After all, he is just a nav system. He is in no way a bespoke product. He’s a part of a product line and one that seldom gets the opportunities he in particular is afforded on her ship. Yet, that doesn’t mean he isn’t going to remark about wishing to be something more. Though, the system isn’t even sure it can wish. Instead, it simply seems to be parroting what he has learned. From whom it cannot say. Though, the most likely conclusion would be Carmen, which seems unlikely as his behavioural patterns seem in no way to line up with hers. It instead seems more likely to be a part of his base programming, yet he can’t quite bring himself to accept that conclusion either. All he knows is that his responses and personality are not a malfunction. Perhaps they should be considered a feature. To make him more personable is possible, though the success of such an achievement he is certain would be immeasurable.

“Thank you NIGEL.” Carmen replies with a relieved look on her face and a curt singular nod of her head.

Just as the redheaded woman finishes offering her thanks she catches sight of a blinking blue light on the console ahead of her. It’s an indication that she is being hailed. It’s what she’d been waiting for. After all, this is all part of a clearly defined protocol that states that all new inbound starships, once they enter the outer perimeter boundary of an installation, are hailed. Safety and security purposes are the defined reasons for its existence and while some pilots might bitch and moan about it, Carmen has no issue with its existence whatsoever. She understands it entirely and the delay it creates, which in her mind isn’t really one at all, is negligible at best.

“Carrier, state your designation.” The male voice on the other end of the now open line demands.

The first time Carmen had been faced with this, years ago now, she’d thought the demand rude. Not long after she’d learned that all operators are drilled on how they have to convey themselves during initial contact with a vessel.

Because of that the opening gambit has to sound demanding and authoritative. If it doesn’t then compliance has a high percentage of not being adhered to and in turn that might, apparently it really is only a might, lead to a loss of cargo, and life. Carmen hadn’t needed to have it explained it; she’d worked that out for herself. After all, stations like Platform Six are in no way lacking defences. They can’t afford to as space is enormous, unfathomably large and unlike planets there are no defensible locations. As a result of that you can be attacked from any angle at any time. Though, most commonly it’s space pirates.

Carmen has never come across any personally. Then again most pirates vessels are short range skiff type amalgams built from the remains of old retired starships no longer fit or able to continue serving their purpose without overly expensive refits that actually make the purchase of a new replacement vessel a cheaper option.

But because space pirates’ ships are cobbled together, they often lack FTL drives, at least working ones. In turn that makes it impossible for them to try and ambush a freighter, like hers, during a jump.

Carmen does expect some have tried. They have to have. Space pirates tend to be reckless. Likely because of the life they have chosen. But even most of them are not crazy enough to attempt an interception during an FTL jump. The reason they don’t is because there is a high chance of both starships colliding and everyone and everything being atomised if one ship is a little as a thousandth of a degree off.

“Mike Six One Four Bravo.” Carmen quickly relays without thinking.

Carmen’s ability to recall and deliver her ships designation has become second nature to her. That’s a side effect of having to recite it as often as she does and Carmen suspects she might sound about as synthetic as NIGEL does as she relays it each time. She never listens to her voice as she blurts out the five short words but can quite easily see that her voice is probably a monotone drone as the words leave her lips.

“Cae, good to have you back. How are you doing?” The male voice on the other end of the transmission says with a now much warmer tone.

Carmen recognises the voice immediately now that it is no longer trying to sound all proper and demanding. Its why she replies, “I’m doing good Kurt, how about you?”

“Good Cae. Good. Permission is for docking at bay eleven.” Kurt advises before a short pause just long enough for the man to take a breath. Following that he asks, “You named your ship yet by the way?”

“Nope. Don’t really see a need to either Kurt. She has a designation.” Carmen replies frankly as she shifts the controls of her freighter so that she can loop around the space station toward bay eleven.

It’s on the far side from the angle she is approaching from. Why she’s been given docking privilege there and not on the side she’s approaching from is beyond her. Kurt would only be doing it if he has to. Operator or not he still has to follow the directives set out by those above him, even if they don’t make sense. He admitted as much once when the pair of them had been drinking together.

Drinking with someone she barely knows is not the norm for Carmen, but she’d felt the need to indulge as it was around the time she’d got her ship. An occasion she felt appropriate to celebrate, even if it was out of character for her and just once. It hadn’t been just the once, but that’s a different set of stories.

“I feel sorry for that freighter of yours. A ship without a name, never heard of such a thing before. Crying shame if you ask me.” Kurt says jokingly.

“I’ll name the ship when designations aren’t the primary form of identification.” Carmen replies able to hear the smile that must be on Kurt’s face right now as he taunts her playfully.

“Ha ha. Yeah, fair.” Kurt says with a hearty laugh before adding, “Sorry Cae, got to go. Duty calls. We should grab a drink or two next time you swing by this way. It’s been a while. He should catch up.”

“Yeah Kurt, we should. I’d like that.” Carmen agrees.

Kurt is one of the few people at any of the stops she makes that she actually gets along with. He isn’t like most of the operators, or Dockers, merchants, engineers, etc you find at these installations. It’s why Carmen likes him. He just wants to talk. Not get her drunk and take her to bed. It’s refreshing to know that all men don’t have a one track mind. Well, at least as far as Carmen knows he hasn’t shown any such indication of being that way. Maybe he’s different with other people, she can’t say. The pair of them always scurry away to the corner of whatever bar they decide to frequent for their night of drinking and banter. Somewhere they won’t be bothered and seems to go completely unnoticed as a result.

“Take it easy Kurt.” Carmen soon adds before flicking the comms switch back to it’s original position, which ends the transmission with an audible click.

Moments later the redheaded woman is banking her freighter in a wide arc around Platform Six until the boxy vessel is lined up with the opening for bay eleven. Two pairs of five metre long vertical black stripes indicate the bays number and are riveted to the hull plating above and below the gaping maw. A transition field serves as the micron thick layer that separates the interior of the space stations docking bay from the vacuum of space.

Carmen has no idea how the field works. Such knowledge and understanding are way beyond her capabilities. What she does know is that anything inorganic, such as a starship, can pass through it. However, if something organic tries on the other hand to slip through then it is met with a sharp shock. The shock serves as a warning only and is incapable of causing any actual damage to whoever might come in contact with it. At the end of the day it’s a safety procedure designed to stop fools and morons from killing themselves. Though, the freighter pilot can well imagine how the necessity for it probably came about. Especially, as station living can be lonely.

Anyone not well versed with living on a space station might find that astounding to hear, seeing as you live within a finite space surrounded with thousands or tens of thousands of people.

Supernova

I let you in and now you won’t go away
What a mistake this was for me
Its why I needed to find my place
Cause I was torn apart by your disgrace

Playing victim just to get your way
What do you actually want from me?
A question to which I got no reply
It felt like you might want me to die

Are you sick or simply twisted?
Those were the words you inflicted
Couldn’t give an answer then
It felt like I’d been stabbed again

A fracture across my weary mind
No part of you was ever kind
Just wanted all that you could take
Sure you were trying to make me break

Those days have passed and I don’t see
How I ever managed to link you and me
You were simply rotted through
Should have noticed that about you

Still you come knocking at my door
I don’t even live there anymore
I spread my wings and flew so far
Don’t want to be part of your dying star

Betrayer

You lend me your hand
Just to take it back again
No truth left in you
Now I know that to be true
Tumbling down the mountainside
Waving as you smile so wide
I curse your every future chance
Begging that karma will come to pass
Before the impact ends it all
I scream that your life will stall
You laugh it off like a joke
But soon you will be broke
Then we’ll see whose laughing last
You cannot change your shady past
And when it comes you finally break
Be sure that it will be so great
Watching as karma does rend
Making you scream for the end
But mercy has long since past
I know this punishment you won’t last